How to solve the birth rate crisis: lower standards
There comes a moment, a few weeks after you give birth, when your baby outgrows their Lilliputian clothes and you’re obliged to replace ‘newborn’ with ‘0-3 months’. At which point, usually while still absolutely steaming with hormones, you find yourself sitting on their bedroom floor, staring at these teeny garments, trying to decide if you’re going to keep them (have another baby) or give them to the charity shop (start leaving leaflets about vasectomy around the house). Historically, this was a major decision for you, but one which had almost no relevance to anyone else. But as the birth rate steadily declines, and the UK is set, for the first