Steerpike

Douglas Carswell is not like normal politicians; he’s authentic, genuine and in touch with real people. Or so the spin goes. So what was today’s by-election-day stunt at a polling station in Clacton all about? Emerging with his thumbs up, Ukip’s soon-to-be-MP for Clacton looked every inch the candidate, taking part in the usual election-day voting photocall. Except Carswell is not eligible to vote in the constituency, as he lives in Fulham and rents a house that falls just outside the boundary of the seat. And surely the authentic and genuine Mr Carswell did not deliberately leave the village where he really lives off of the statement-of-persons document that anyone standing for Parliament has to fill in?

Far from it being Mr Steerpike's prerogative to call a former editor of the Spectator a wally, he was rather amused by Boris's latest escapade. Now we can all relive those classic moments when the Mayor of London was hunting for a seat in Parliament, with 'Where's Boris?' - a Wally-style search-and-find picture book, out next month from Orion. Another step toward immortality for BoJo. How many other wannabe PMs have made it into children's book hero format?

What exactly is going on with Nick Clegg’s conference get-up in Glasgow? As of this writing, the Deputy Prime Minister is wearing his third outfit of the day -- casual jeans and a dark shirt. Mr S is sure he’s seen something similar to this hideous apparel somewhere before. Given the Liberal Democrats are spending this week laying into the Tories as part of the differentiation strategy from their coalition parties, was it really wise for their leader to dress up in his own version of David Cameron’s much lampooned holiday gear?

After David Cameron’s conference speech, Mr S noticed a YouTube video of the Prime Minister all over Facebook and Twitter. For a moment it looked like a great coup for Cameron. Except the video wasn’t showing Cameron’s actual speech but rather a ‘comic’ hip-hop mashup of his words. It features the Prime Minister’s Home Counties accent rapping the lines ‘I’m hardcore/I know the score/and I’m disgusted with the poor’ to the bouncy beat of Eminem’s ‘Lose Yourself’. Strong flow and excellent lyricism from MC Dave but sadly not the election winning stuff that he hoped for. Cassetteboy’s ‘Cameron Conference Rap’ video has racked up two million views in only 3 days.

Many Tories had begun to wonder where Michael Gove had got to. The Chief Whip’s move from the Department for Education was heralded with a briefing that he would be doing far more broadcasting, representing the government front and centre on the airwaves. However, there was only silence. Though he has been dealing with defections and whipping up the air strike vote, the darling of Tory conferences past was mysteriously missing from the official platform schedule in Birmingham. Until this afternoon. Taking to the stage to introduce the Prime Minister, Gove received the warmest applause yet from the crowd. The left loathe Michael Gove, something that only bolsters his credentials in Tory-land.

Most Secretaries of State tend to lay low the night before their big conference speech, redrafting and practising. Not so Theresa May. The glammed-up Home Secretary was working the party scene hard last night, flanked by a bolstered entourage. After losing her Special Adviser Fiona Cunningham in blue on blue briefing row, May has brought in former Mail journalist Liz Sanderson to handle her media. If it looks like a leadership campaign... May’s speech this morning was steely. She talked about freedom and a free society. With her smart new haircut, it was not long before obvious comparisons were being made to a the last strong woman to dominate the Conservative Party.

No Mark Reckless, no Brooks Newmark and now no Bow Group.  The oldest conservative think-thank has announced that they are boycotting this year’s Tory conference. It seems, for Dave at least, bad news really does come in threes. The venerable think tank, founded in 1951 and counting Lords Howe and Heseltine among its members, has charged the Conservative Party Conference with being 'a corporate venue for press and lobbyists' rather than 'a genuine forum for conservatism and Conservative Party members'. With MEP and Bow Group member Dan Hannan refusing to attend and Lord Tebbit worrying that CPC was no longer 'anything to do with Party members', the Tories might have reason to worry.

The Conservative conference pub is back again this year, with its usual bitter jokes about Labour. Mr Steerpike had an exclusive peek at the posters they're using to poke fun at Ed Miliband's party. The pub this year is called the 'Tax & Spend'. Funnily enough, they've decided to remind the Labour leader of the deficit, just in case he's forgotten: Perhaps someone could set up a Campaign for Real Deficit Reduction.

First we had Mrs Miliband redefining her role from elusive lawyer to political campaigning wife; now we have another once shy 'leader's wife' tweaking their public profile. The Liberal Democrats get very grumpy if you refer to Miriam González Durántez as Mrs Clegg, but the Dechert LLP lawyer is described as the 'wife of Nick Clegg' by Mumsnet for the launch of their Mumsnet Book of Animal Stories. None of the other contributors to the book - including Anthony Browne, the former Children's Laureate and Mumsnet founder Justine Roberts - have been defined by their spouse. Brave...

The hall may have been half empty during his speech, but New York Mayor Bill de Blasio said lots of nice things about Ed Miliband during the closing session of Labour Party conference in Manchester. And the similarities between the two politicians are copious. They're both metropolitan lefties who are far more ideologically radical than they let on. Both face hostile media and talk about the rising cost of living. But that's mainly because Ed’s strategist are ripping off large parts of the winning Democrat’s playbook: Ed even recreated de Blasio’s widely mocked campaign gaffe of being photographed eating awkwardly.

Having spent four years sticking to a wave at the end of conference and the odd photograph together with her husband, Justine Thornton has burst onto centre stage at Labour's conference. Mrs Miliband - and she uses her Miliband name today - has written to Labour activists pledging her commitment to getting her man into Downing Street: 'Honestly, as a young lawyer who wanted to change the world, I never would have believed that I would become a politician's wife. It's not a role you apply for, nor one I've found easy to understand. Just after Ed won, I Googled a few terms to see if there were books I could read on the role of a politician's spouse. All that came up was references to 'the good wife', and that wasn't quite what I had in mind.