Steerpike

Steerpike

Steerpike is The Spectator's gossip columnist, serving up the latest tittle tattle from Westminster and beyond. Email tips to steerpike@spectator.co.uk or message @MrSteerpike

Tuesday

Steerpike

Godfrey Bloom’s feminine touch

Mr Steerpike has obtained an exclusive extract of everyone's favourite Ukip MEP Godfrey Bloom's new book A Guinea A Minute, which comes out later this week. His response to accusations of misogyny is worth reproducing in full, not least for the chatter it might start: 'I was asked by a journalist what I would be doing on that committee. He was such an earnest young man, I could not resist the sport. I intend to get women to clean behind the fridge I told him with equal earnestness. Well it was one of those “no news days”. Someone shoved a camera in my face “what else?” they called sensing a story where none had been.

Steerpike

The Melanie Phillips Mail mystery

Why was Melanie Phillips ousted as the Monday columnist for the Daily Mail? The Guardian suggests that she was frustrated by the ban on writing about Israel, which is not a restriction placed exclusively on Mel. Meanwhile, the peaceniks over at the Indy claim that Mel’s incendiary appearance on Question Time in June made Paul Dacre hit the red button. The clip above will refresh your memory. The Indy has an axe to grind (having lost Dominic Lawson, who is tipped to replace Mel); but I hear that it's on the money. A source at the Mail tells me: ‘She played up to every stereotype of the paper, and it got too over the top’.

Steerpike

Coffee Shots: Cable’s small beer to Lib Dem activists

Vince Cable is apparently the darling of his party. But not according to this highly scientific poll being conducted by the Campaign for Real Ale at the Liberal Democrat conference in Glasgow, where the Business Secretary is currently the least popular pick from the top dogs in the party for the best person to have a pint with. What a bitter sensation that must be.

Monday

Steerpike

A bridge too far for Ian Katz

More adventures in television from new Newsnight boss Ian Katz. Fresh from his truthful-if-embarrassing slating of Labour’s Rachel Reeves, I hear that Katz has upset another Labour big-wig, Alistair Darling. Apparently, Katz wants to shoot a Scottish referendum debate on a real bridge (presumably the 130-metre Union Bridge in Berwick) between Scotland and England. After the debate, he proposed that members of the audience would ‘vote with their feet’ by walking to either end of the bridge. Darling, who is leading the pro-Union campaign, was not sold on the idea of unionists walking to the English side of river to show their support. PS: Another BBC source says that Katz 'wanted to set-dress it like Checkpoint Charlie!

Steerpike

Ban the word ‘twerk’

Jesse Norman MP, who used to lead the Prime Minister’s policy forum, is using his spare time to write for ConservativeHome. About twerking. For those of you who have missed this craze, the Oxford English Dictionary, in a shameless PR stunt, added the term to their latest edition: ‘To dance to popular music in a sexually provocative manner involving thrusting hip movements and a low, squatting stance.’ Turning to Jesse’s piece, apparently ‘the press have started to scrutinise’ Norman’s ‘public remarks with all the fervent enthusiasm of a group of Miley Cyrus fans at a twerking convention.’ How could we not?

Friday

Steerpike

Blessed are the spin doctors | 13 September 2013

After spilling the communion wine down his cassock in an attempt to wade into the ongoing Wonga-row, the Archbishop of Canterbury has been rather quiet of late. Justin Welby faced acute embarrassment when he tried to throw the pay-day loan lenders out of the temple, only for it to be revealed that the Church of England’s investment portfolio include a significant stakes in such grubby money-lenders.

Thursday

Steerpike

Labour get attacks in early on Toby Young

Toby Young has rattled some Labour cages by publicly mooting a bid for the Tory nomination for Hammersmith. ‘Z List Toryboy celebrity Toby Young wants to be an MP’ spins a Labour adviser Imran Ahmed. Then came the hammer blow: ‘Think he's gotten House of Commons mixed up with Big Brother house.’ Oh, that one will hurt. Should have saved it for the leaflets! So who is Ahmed? Well he last hit the headlines after he was accused of ghost-writing tweets for his old boss Andy Slaughter - the Labour MP for Hammersmith. Could he be speaking with Slaughter’s voice again?

Steerpike

A book Fred will want to shred

Michael Gove and Ed Vaizey were leading the government's representation at the launch party last night for Iain Martin’s book Making It Happen: Fred Goodwin, RBS and the men who blew up the British economy. David Davis and Liam Fox were also leading the laughter at the Travellers Club as Martin explained that many tried to warn him against writing his study of the financial crisis. Not only because he was about to upset some very rich people but also from a future sales point of view as apparently 'by then the economy would have been sorted out.

Steerpike

Whips keep it casual

The Tory whips come in for plenty of criticism when things are going wrong in the party. But you can't accuse them of taking their fingers off the sartorial pulse. Mr Steerpike has seen an email sent out to all Conservative MPs explaining the meaning of that terrifying term 'smart casual': Following Keith Simpson’s recent missive about smart casual dress, some considerable confusion has arisen about the sartorial requirements of being so attired. For the avoidance of all confusion, the attachment is the definitive statement of what is “smart casual”.

Wednesday

Steerpike

A rare success for Downing Street spin machine

Downing Street and the press are rarely a productive coupling, though it seems the PM’s spin team have, for once, inadvertently spawned something positive. Introducing his new book about journalistic cliché to the world at a star-studded occasion’ in ‘London's glamorous West End’ this week, Bloomberg hack Rob Hutton told how No.10 had triggered him to write Romps, Tots and Boffins: ‘This book wouldn't have happened at all, but for No 10's inability to find a plane with room for journalists whenever the PM goes to controversial places.

Tuesday

Steerpike

The curse of Newsnight strikes again

Poor Ian Katz. Just days into his new job as editor of Newsnight and he's already in hot water. Accidentally panning a guest behind their back is hardly the most dignified of starts. Mr Steerpike would love to know who this was really meant to be seen by rather than Katz's thousands of followers: While Rachel Reeves is undoubtedly tedious, it's hardly a good idea to actually say it. Katz's former Guardian colleagues will no doubt be happy to see him enjoying his new outlet. So what are the repercussions of the blunder? Not great if the reaction of Labour's attack dog Michael Dugher is anything to go by: 'Good luck in future to Newsnight in trying to persuade Labour people to go on their frankly rather boring programme at 11 at night,' he quips. I'm not sure he's joking.

Monday

Steerpike

Alex Salmond’s selective history lesson

The First Minister of Scotland is masterful at mixing anti-English rhetoric, rose-tinted recollections of Scottish history and no gloves politicking. When he does it right, it can be devastating. History is at the heart of his campaign for Scottish independence in the run up to the referendum, so I was surprised to see how quiet he is today over an important point in his nation’s heritage. How come the Scottish government are silent over today’s anniversary of the Battle of Flodden. Where is the usual fanfare? Could it be because the invasion of England cost James IV of Scotland his life in 1513, taking with him most of the Scottish aristocracy? The 30,000 invading Scots were not enough to defeat the smaller English army, and the ruling class of Scotland faced a near wipe out.

Steerpike

Godfrey’s gaffe of the day

Barely a day goes by without Ukip’s gaffe-prone senior MEP Godfrey Bloom getting into a spot of bother. Fresh from arguing companies should be allowed to sack pregnant women, claiming ‘most women can find the mustard in the pantry quicker than a man and most men can reverse a car better than a woman,’ it was his ‘bongo bongo land’ comments that caused the most damage. Taking to the web might not be the best idea for Godfrey, as he discovered earlier when having a go at Channel Four News: @Goddersukip are you perhaps mistaking me for @krishgm? He is a different person. — Faisal Islam (@faisalislam) September 9, 2013 Do all journalists look the same for Godfrey?

Thursday

Steerpike

Blue blood on blue blood

The People’s Princess is back in the papers, thanks to the latest film about her life, and one minor royal couldn’t resist re-opening old wounds. According the New York Post, Lady Pamela Hicks, Prince Philip's cousin, began gently: ‘[Diana] had enormous charisma, she was beautiful, [and] she was very good at empathy with the general crowd.’  But, Lady Pamela said, ‘she had no feeling at all for her husband or his family.’ And there was more: ‘She was really spiteful, really unkind to him — and, my God, he’s a man who needs support and encouragement. [The marriage] absolutely destroyed him. He looked grey and ghost-like. Now of course he’s blossomed again. [She] made everybody believe she’d been thrown to the wolves.

Steerpike

Nick Boles meets his doppelganger

The world of social media often goes through the looking glass, but today has been particularly bizarre. Housing minister Nick Boles has decided to join the fun and games on Twitter, announcing his arrival this afternoon. The problem is the popular parody account, General Boles. The General’s satirical pictures (such as the one above) and funnies enjoy a cult following in the Westminster village.  And he can be a plausible imposter; our friends at the Guardian, for instance, were taken in when he appeared. In fact the General is such a power in the land that the real Boles, a minister of the Crown no less, has prostrated himself before this parody. ‘I will never be as funny or as good at Photoshop... I am but a pale imitation,’ he said earlier.

Wednesday

Steerpike

Coffee Shots: George Osborne discovers Wikipedia

On this balmy summer's evening, George Osborne has popped over to east London to get down with some of the tech kids at the Campus Party in The O2. Judging from the above picture, the chancellor is quite impressed at what Jimmy Wales, founder of Wikipedia, had to show him: https://twitter.com/George_Osborne/statuses/375312989236109312 Just don't expect tax rates anyone can edit.

Steerpike

Boris Johnson and the ‘Aztec death ray’

As Mr Steerpike reported late last night, the gloves were off between Russell Brand and Charles Moore at the GQ Man of the Year awards. But that was not the only fight to split the audience. After American comedian Seth MacFarlane’s disastrous turn at this year’s Oscars, you would have thought that award ceremony hosts might be wary of musical numbers. Yet that did not stop Rob Brydon bursting into song about Stephen Fry’s recent suicide attempt, warbling that the National Treasure could not be left alone with 'vodka and pills'. A shaky start to say the least, which was not helped by a bad Eric Pickles joke that left most of the stellar audience scratching their heads wondering who this Pickles bloke was.

Tuesday

Steerpike

GQ Man of the Year: Charles Moore vs Russell Brand

The Foreign Secretary was left not knowing where to look at tonight's GQ Man of the Year awards, when this parish's very own Charles Moore declared war on the media luvvies. Invited to present the award for Writer of the Year, Hague looked noticeably relieved to hand over the gong for Moore's epic biography of Baroness Thatcher. But the fireworks were yet to come. Taking to the stage to Elvis Costello's She, it was a poignant moment, only to be shattered by Moore himself who decided to take a chunk out of Russell Brand for his jokes earlier about the sponsor, Hugo Boss, who infamously designed uniforms for the Nazis. While Brand quipped that 'let's face it they looked fantastic', Moore disagreed somewhat.

Steerpike

Vinnie Jones does not do irony

Thuggish footballer turned terrible actor Vinnie Jones has gone all man-down-the-pub over the state of the nation. Speaking from his LA home to the Radio Times, the US immigrant said: ‘There's nothing to come back to here. To me, England is past its sell-by date. It's not the country I grew up in. It's a European country now. If someone blindfolded you and put you on a plane in LA, and you landed at Heathrow and they took it off, you wouldn't have a clue where you were. I just think we should get our own house in order before we open our doors. It's mind-boggling to me.’  After giving England two smoking barrels, is it pedantic of me to remind all concerned that Jones played international matches in red rather than white?