Steerpike

How far the mighty have fallen. While he was once known as the decisive fixer, who was able to get things done inside Labour, deputy leader Tom Watson has largely been sidelined by the Corbyn crew. Rumour has it that the MP is now so sick of being the perennial outsider, he is even considering other career options outside of politics. Mr S has heard for example, that he is keen to move into media, specifically radio. Well, last week was his chance to have a go, as he filled in for Nigel Farage on a 6pm LBC radio slot. Watson clearly enjoyed his spell in the limelight, and made his best efforts to convince LBC to offer him a permanent gig.

Poor old Philip Hammond. In a bid to raise some laughs during his Budget announcement, the Chancellor made a series of gags that fell somewhat flat in the Commons. But there was one big laugh in the chamber. Unfortunately for Hammond, though, it came after he made a reference to his budget next year. 'You won't be here', a Labour MP shouted out. Mr S thinks Spreadsheet Phil should have seen that one coming...

Budget day is upon us and it's safe to say that expectations have been set rather low when it comes to Philip Hammond's big moment. The Chancellor has said he plans to remain a fiscal hawk – and warned that there will be a brand new Budget in the new year should a 'no deal' Brexit occur. Perhaps then it's little wonder that the schedulers at the BBC don't seem to regard the event as a showstopper event. In fact, the Times's Patrick Kidd wonders if they are trying to send a message. During BBC2's Budget coverage, BBC1 will be showing 'Money for Nothing', 'Flog it!' and 'Pointless': By around 5pm, the channels could be in sync...

The British press has been unable to name the famous businessman who has taken out an injunction against the Daily Telegraph to prevent it reporting on the multiple allegations of sexual harassment, racist abuse and bullying against him. But such laws do not apply to parliament where, in the House of Lords, Peter Hain named this person today as Sir Philip Green. This matters because the law does allow journalists to report (but not comment on) what is said in parliament.

Once again, rumours began to swirl around Westminster on Tuesday that there would – finally – be a confidence vote in Theresa May. News outlets and journalists on Twitter breathlessly announced that the chairman of the 1922 committee, Graham Brady, had received the necessary 48 letters from MPs to call a confidence vote. Unfortunately for them, all the speculation ended up being untrue. Despite frequent claims that a Tory revolt is underway, the numbers never quite seem to add up. Only Brady himself knows how many letters MPs have sent, and he confirmed later that the threshold had not been reached this time. This led Mr S to think: haven't politicians and pundits predicted Theresa May's impending doom several times before?

This week the House of Commons commission will meet to discuss its response to the Cox report on bullying and harassment at Westminster. The report concludes that a number of officials, including one John Bercow, could need to stand down in order for real change to come about. Only there is very little chance of that happening as Labour MPs have rallied around the Speaker on the grounds that they think Bercow will be sympathetic to their cause on important Brexit decisions. As Margaret Beckett put it, Brexit ‘trumps’ bullying. So, what role will Bercow play in the coming months? If no deal has been reached by 21 January, it has been thought that who ever is in the Speaker's chair would get to decide whether MPs could amend the Brexit motion.

After a hectic political summer, with multiple cabinet resignations and minor rebellions, even the most seasoned of Westminster watchers were struggling to keep track of all the junior ministers in Theresa May's team. But even after the resignation dust has settled, it seems that Commons staff are still struggling to remember who's in the government and who's left. To highlight that questions were taking place in the chamber about defence, their social media team released this video, featuring the department's ministers: Tobias Ellwood, Gavin Williamson, Mark Lancaster and err, Guto Bebb: https://twitter.com/HouseofCommons/status/1054366769257811968 Only somewhat embarrassingly for them and him, Bebb resigned from the government in July over a Brexit vote.

It's the day of the People's Vote march and over half a million protesters are estimated to have descended on the capital to call for a second referendum. The pro-EU protesters have brought with them a range of placards – while some parents have opted to simply save paper and write pro-EU slogans on their children's backs. Mr S will leave readers to rank today's offerings: https://twitter.com/brokenbottleboy/status/1053612226219831296 https://twitter.com/HenryCPorter/status/1053646639750098945 https://twitter.com/mpvine/status/1053678434369572864 https://twitter.com/mpvine/status/1053681304376614914 https://twitter.com/mpvine/status/1053679945598296065 https://twitter.com/mpvine/status/1053677481092374529 https://twitter.

When the FT revealed today that former Lib Dem leader and deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg was joining Facebook as a head of global affairs, there was a predictable chorus of outrage from Labour MPs. In a statement, Labour’s Jon Trickett decried Clegg’s new position as: ‘a damning indictment of the sorry state of our country's politics that, at a time when digital giants such as Facebook are rightly coming under public scrutiny, our former Deputy Prime Minister has been hired to lobby on their behalf. Labour is committed to slamming shut the revolving door between politics and big business, which for too long has corroded public trust in politics.

We've all been there. Having to ask someone to repeat themselves because you couldn't understand them is embarrassing enough. Spare a thought then for Sir Paul Beresford. In the Commons just now, the Tory MP failed to understand the Glaswegian accent of the SNP’s David Linden. Twice. Luckily for Beresford, deputy speaker Lindsay Hoyle eventually stepped in to spare his blushes: “I think the answer might be helped if you can reply in writing,” he said. Oh dear...