Steerpike

Of all the politicians to be the first to wire in and blast into the Metaverse, it turns out that the House of Commons's brave pioneer has become none other than Matthew Hancock. The MP joined the online world today as part of an event organised by the tech firm Shift. Mr S couldn't help but notice though that the Cybernaut Hancock that emerged from the Metaverse wormhole a different man than many of his colleagues remember. His avatar, created by the tech firm for him to roam this new universe (pictured above) seems to sport a resurgent hairline and a rather strapping build. What on earth has brought all this about?

Oh dear. It appears the blue-on-blue warfare that has dominated the Tory leadership campaign is taking its toll. After reports last week that members of Liz Truss's team hope Rishi Sunak will decline any job she offers him should she win, it appears the former chancellor has taken such briefings to heart. When a Radio 2 interviewer asked Rishi Sunak today whether he would serve as Liz Truss’ Health Secretary, Sunak reacted with an amused laugh and answered: ‘you really need to agree with the big things because it’s tough… and I wouldn’t want to end up in a situation like that again.’ Sunak is following in the footsteps of Jeremy Hunt.

When you say the name ‘Andy Coulson,’ it’s hard not to think of the phone hacking scandal. The former News of the World editor served five months of an 18-month sentence for conspiracy to commit phone hacking in 2014 but has now managed to rebound from Belmarsh to business success, with a PR firm making half-a-million pounds a year. According to company accounts, the one-time Downing Street aide’s new outfit Coulson Partners Limited – for which Coulson is listed as the sole director and owner of 100 per cent of shares – declared total equity of £496,000 at the end of 2021. It pulled in more than a million last year, less £541,000 owed to creditors.

It's the scandal all Westminster is talking about. Appearing on ITV's This Morning Rishi Sunak told viewers that if he goes to McDonald's with his daughters they all get the breakfast wrap: 'My eldest daughter, we get the wrap so if I’m with her that wrap with the hashbrown and everything in it is what we do.' But as Times sleuth and self-proclaimed 'breakfast wrap aficionado' Geri Scott pointed out such wraps 'were taken off the menu in March 2020 due to Covid.' McDonald's themselves are yet to weigh in on the row today but in January the fast-food chain's official UK account confirmed that 'bagels and breakfast wraps are officially gone from the menu' declaring that 'it's now time to say "that's a wrap."' And there was Mr S thinking it was Burger King that sold Whoppers.

The Tory leadership teams rolled into Belfast this afternoon, clad in metaphorical red, white and blue and eager to display their unionist credentials. But while all eyes were on Ulster, elsewhere the real scrap was happening at the Conservative Environment Network where proxies were battling it out for the two final contenders. In team Truss's corner was Lord Goldsmith, the former MP now ensconced in ermine, while George Eustice, the soon-to-be-departed Environment Secretary, did the honours for Rishi Sunak. The two men have both been jousting for their patrons but there was little sign of courtly behaviour on show. Eustice, who serves as Goldsmith's boss in the department, accused Truss of refusing to recognise the importance of animal welfare in post-Brexit trade deals.

The New York Times has never been shy about sharing its opinion – especially when it comes to bashing Britain. In recent years, Mr S has greatly enjoyed reading the London dispatches from America's least reliable news source, in which Brexit Britain is re-imagined as an autocratic archipelago where plague-riddled, rain-drenched, swamp-dwelling subjects devour legs of mutton and fascistic propaganda. But now, Steerpike has rare cause to bemoan the 'Gray Lady's' absence. For the NYT, whose staff proudly consider it to be the world's leading liberal newspaper, has been strangely quiet on an area of intense local concern. The stabbing of Sir Salman Rushdie shocked the world last Friday, with expression of condemnation and solidarity being issued across the world.

Cast your mind back to 2020. Back then, in the dark days of Covid, a ray of light was apparently offered in the form of New Zealand’s Jacinda Ardern. Here, we were told, was the shining beacon of hope, the solution to all our ails. A ‘zero Covid’ approach and a total national lockdown; closed borders and open hearts. Across the country Guardianistas gushed praise and oozed platitudes: here, at last, was the ideal model of a sensible, liberal, centrist leader. Fast forward two years and all that has now changed. First Ardern managed to irritate both right and left with her clampdown on immigration and complacency on China.

Something funny is in the water in Oxfordshire. In recent months councillors there have embarked on a spree of unorthodox eco-measures, no doubt encouraged by the Green party’s gains in local elections. Back in March, TV star Jeremy Clarkson led a protest of farmers, enraged by the County Council’s decision to only provide ‘plant-based’ food at council meetings, even though it cost taxpayers more. And now, Mr S has discovered the latest taxpayer-funded wheeze: a new website called ‘Climate Action Oxfordshire’ with some intriguing advice for the local subjects who funded it.

Poor Rishi Sunak. Membership polls put him 30 point behind Liz Truss but there's still three-and-a-half weeks to go in the Tory leadership race. The former Chancellor is being forced to spend his summer traipsing around the country, trapped in some hideous purgatory, waiting for the sweet release of 5 September to halt the seemingly endless number of hustings, debates, interviews and meetings. But it seems the longtime heir apparent is having as much luck online as he is offline. Mr S has done some digging and Sunak has spent more than two-and-a-half times has much as Liz Truss on Facebook adverts, for all the good that it has done him. During the course of the campaign Sunak's two pages have spent a combined total of £15,800 compared to Truss's £6,000.