Rivals

Wednesday

Elizabeth Day

My first act as prime minister

If I were prime minister for a day (which is looking like an increasingly realistic prospect for all of us), one of my first acts would be to ban events being held on Monday nights. The first day of the week is always a jarring change of pace from the lazy joys of the weekend. I prefer my Monday evening to be a restful transition point into the rest of the week, like gradually dunking a Digestive into a mug of tea in order to get the right ratio of crunch to sogginess. You don’t want to hurl the whole biscuit in there at once. Alas, the British Book Awards held its ceremony on a Monday and, for the first time ever, decided to nominate me for a prize.

James Delingpole

I’m done with Rivals

Everybody has been raving about Legends, the Netflix series about undercover customs officers in the 1990s busting a heroin ring. But even though it’s ‘based on a true story’, there are times when it feels more like a histrionically implausible, over-reverential recruitment drive for HM Customs and Excise. ‘Thought they were just those men in white shirts embarrassing you at the airport by exposing the stash of cheap baccy hidden in your holiday underwear? Think again!’, you can imagine the tagline running. The model here, of course, would be Top Gun – the 1986 movie, heavily supported by the US military, which supposedly caused the number of men applying to become US Navy fighter pilots to increase by 500 per cent (a figure that’s since been debunked).

Friday

Ivo Delingpole

Rivals is an ode to Thatcherite excess

Today, Rivals returns for a second series on Disney+. The first series was that rarest of phenomena: an adaptation that didn’t hate its source material. Sure, the producers decided to cram the plot with more subtle-as-a-sledgehammer politics than appears in the actual book, but you could tell they revered Jilly Cooper and the world of Rutshire and wanted to do it justice. Cooper executively produced the first series but must have been away on some days (I can’t see her let a well-heeled huntswoman pronounce the Beaufort hunt ‘Boh-fore’ rather than ‘Boh-fuht’, particularly when a major scene in the book hinges on the pronunciation of ‘Belvoir’).

Tuesday

Alexander Larman

Waitrose must leave bad taste in the Eighties

Should you visit your local Waitrose store this week – and hope you don’t witness an altercation between a shoplifter and a member of staff about to be fired for doing his job – you might be surprised by a new range of products. In what the company is calling ‘a vibrant, decadent celebration of pure noshtalgia’, Waitrose has launched a series of 80s-themed foods. These include everything from Scotch egg sandwiches and steak Diane-flavoured crisps to rhubarb and custard ice cream and – horror of horrors – ‘peach melba spritz’, which its blurb describes as ‘a delicious blend of juicy peach and ripe raspberry, lifted with sparkling crisp bubbles for a beautifully balanced summer spritz’.

Thursday

Stephen Arnell

The name’s not Bond: the best cinematic rivals to 007

The Covid-19 delayed No Time to Die, Daniel Craig’s final outing as James Bond, is set for release this November – a more traditional slot for the franchise than the previous April 2020 date. Whilst expectations for the picture may not be quite as high as expected due to the disappointing reception given to 2015’s Spectre, there’s little doubt that Bond fans will be out in force – social distancing permitting. Although we tend to think of Ian Fleming’s character as a unique creation, that hasn’t stopped filmmakers trying to get a piece of the action over the years. Some have proved successful, but many others have fallen by the wayside.