Steerpike

Steerpike

Steerpike is The Spectator's gossip columnist, serving up the latest tittle tattle from Westminster and beyond. Email tips to steerpike@spectator.co.uk or message @MrSteerpike

Boris booed at Queen’s celebrations

Tory plotters have been keen to stress that any plans to oust Boris Johnson as Prime Minister are strictly on hold during the Platinum Jubilee weekend. But that doesn’t mean Johnson’s political woes are going away. The great and the good were at St Paul’s Cathedral for the Queen’s Jubilee Thanksgiving service this morning. While the Monarch herself was unable to attend, Priti Patel, in a bright pink dress and hat, Keir Starmer, in his usual blue lounge suit, and Sadiq Khan, in tow with his wife, were among those in attendance. The event, though, was not exactly the smooth operation that organisers had hoped for. Five Royal Air Force soldiers, who were rigidly standing by as guests walked into the service, collapsed in the cathedral’s grounds.

Parly passholders splash £10k a week on booze

After the lean years of Covid, there were fears for the future of the parliamentary bars in Westminster. Would they ever return to their former greatness as the social hubs of SW1? Fortunately, the removal of all restrictions from the end of January and the resumption of full-time service has prompted a roaring trade in the half-a-dozen fleshpots of parliament. For in the first eight weeks of normalcy, the Commons cash-registers recorded an impressive £82,000 worth of sales between February to March to 2022. More than £10,000 a week was made flogging everything from pints of the ultra-popular guest ale and Guinness – which boasted £8,376 and £6,582 worth of respective sales – down to 17 champagne cocktails eight Kir Royales and two Camparis.

Tories pay tribute to our Queen

The economy may be tanking and Boris in peril but MPs were grateful this week for a four day respite to mark the Queen’s platinum jubilee. Many chose to flee Westminster for home pastures elsewhere: Brandon Lewis got to press the flesh at Hillsborough Castle while his backbench colleague Laura Farris snapped pics in Newbury with a Churchill impersonator. But a fair few decided to remain in London to pay tribute to our long-suffering monarch at the Trooping of the Colour on Horseguard’s Parade. Somehow Mr S blagged a ticket - they let anyone in these days - and enjoyed the chance to see our elected Tory masters pay tribute to our unelected ones.

Will Sadiq make a Commons comeback?

Fresh from their impressive gains in last month’s elections, attention in London Labour circles has now turned towards the future intentions of Sadiq Khan. The capital’s mayor won re-election last year and is due to see his term expire at the beginning of May 2024. But after two terms in office, will he be running for a third? In January he told James O’Brien on LBC that he was ‘looking forward’ to standing again for the mayoralty and said he ‘doesn’t want’ Sir Keir Starmer’s job. But such claims have not dampened speculation that Khan could return to the Commons, depending on the date of the next election.

Channel 4’s failed charm offensive

It's Jubilee week in London. Boom times for royal hacks mean tough times for their lobby counterparts. Fortunately, today's publication of the latest edition of the MPs' register of interests is a godsend for story-starved journalists, scrabbling around to write about something that isn't about Harry and Meghan. Perusing the register this morning, Mr S was intrigued to see the name of Channel 4 popping up regularly as a frequent donor to MPs across the House. The public broadcaster has desperately been trying to fight a rearguard action against privatisation in recent months and appears to have launched something of a belated charm offensive to aid that goal.

Kate Forbes, Tartan Thatcher

The SNP's political gifts know no bounds. Mr S has to take his bonnet off to Kate Forbes – Sturgeon's finance secretary and heir apparent. For no Tory minister could have ever announced the spending cuts which she did yesterday without facing the wrath of the Scottish establishment. Couched in managerial jargon-ese, Forbes' spending review statement promised a 'reset' in the country's public services over the next five years. 'Reset,' of course, is simply a shorthand for 'real term cuts', with the funding axe set to fall on a swathe of different areas including local government, higher education, the courts service and cultural affairs. Despite all this, there is still some cash for the SNP's own vanity projects, with £20 million put aside to plan for another referendum.

Jesus College plots overhaul of its China Centre

During the past two years Jesus College has been a regular in the newspaper headlines. The Cambridge University college was last month found to have accepted cash from a 'very high risk' Chinese university for research into China’s prime tool of foreign influence. It came after a string of stories which contrasted the willingness of Jesus to accept donations from controversial Chinese sources with its efforts to remove a historic memorial linked to the slave trade from its chapel. Now though, it seems that the college has been moved to act. According to an email seen by The Spectator, 'following a detailed review by a panel of Fellows, the college has today announced the restructure of the China Centre, including changing its name and funding model'.

Bungling DVLA claims it’s ‘a great place to work’

Which government agency has performed the worst in this pandemic? It's a difficult question to answer. The Passport Office has its critics; delays at HMRC have meant tax rebates have gone months overdue. But for Steerpike's money, the Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency (DVLA) is hard to beat. In March, the Times reported that some 3,400 civil servants there had done no work on full pay for significant periods of the pandemic. Some staff even boasted to undercover reporters that they had watched Netflix at the expense of the public, all while thousands waited for their driving applications to be processed. Still, such public embarrassments appear to be of little concern to those still employed there.

Wanted: tech support for Rishi

Rishi Sunak may be a big fan of Instagram but he hasn't always demonstrated such a sure touch for tech. The Twitter-savvy politician made headlines earlier this month after claiming that he couldn't raise welfare benefits to shield the most vulnerable because of a 'technically complicated' IT system. Pressed a fortnight ago on further support, Sunak said that such a move was 'not necessarily possible' as 'many of the systems are built so it can only be done once a year, and the decision was taken quite a while ago.' Hardly the white heat of technology, eh?

Is the Financial Times ashamed of capitalism?

It seems no-one has a good word to say about capitalism these days. For now, even the Financial Times – that bible of our captains of industry – seems to have gone off the filthy rich. Once, the newspaper's 'How To Spend It' supplement was an unashamed paean to conspicuous consumption; a veritable smorgasbord of plutocratic excess. The FT itself still describes it in near-orgastic terms, writing that the 28 year-old pull-out is 'the benchmark for luxury lifestyle magazines' with an 'affluent readership' of whom one in five 'has or would consider using the service of a private jet'. But it seems such tributes to the tastes of the rich and powerful are now somewhat déclassé in these times of economic hardship.

Poll: voters pick VAT cut over windfall tax

This has been Boris Johnson's worst week in politics since last week. Under-fire over partygate, accused of watering down the Sue Gray report and facing yet more letters of no-confidence, inflation and the cost-of-living crisis look set to further erode his standing still further. On Thursday, Rishi Sunak unveiled a package of measures to try to alleviate voters' economic pain, announcing a £400 reduction for energy bills and a £650 for eight million families on benefits. This will be paid for by a £5 billion windfall tax on energy companies. Not all voters though seem that impressed by Sunak's choice.

Six of the worst bits from Sue Gray’s report

Politics' longest-running farce is at a close. Sue Gray, that pillar of Whitehall officialdom, has today delivered her report into whether Boris Johnson did indeed break lockdown rules during the pandemic. And while there will no doubt be some relief for those in No. 10 that Gray's inquiries didn't investigate any further parties to those previously reported, some of the details contained in her findings do make for excruciating reading. Below are six of the lowlights from the Sue Gray report.... 1. The Met torpedoed Gray's probe Few institutions emerge well from partygate but the Metropolitan Police probably came out worst.

Tory staff demand change over sleaze in parliament

Sleaze is the watchword in Westminster at the moment. Morale amongst staff on the parliamentary estate was already low before the latest partygate shenanigans. Recent embarrassments about outside interests, dodgy MPs, drinking on the estate and historic sex offences have taken their toll. Few of the twenty-somethings who work in the Commons have a good word to say about our elected members at present, whether it's Neil Parish watching porn or Liam Byrne getting just a two day suspension for bullying his staff. Parish fiddles while Byrne roams, indeed.  Will anything change as a result? Some of those in parliament have had enough.

Sue Gray releases her partygate pics

Well, it's finally here. After five months of waiting, Sue Gray has today released her report into the parties that went on in Downing Street during Covid. Her 60-page report is currently being pored over by hacks, spinners and MPs across parliament, ahead of Boris Johnson’s appearance at Prime Minister’s Questions today. But initial attention has focused on the nine pictures which Gray released as part of her inquiry (many more images of the lockdown shindigs were reportedly taken).  And the early conclusion is one of surprise at just how anodyne the gatherings seem to be, in light of the frenzied speculation about what they would depict.

SNP U-turn on power-sharing deals

Shock, horror! Another principled SNP stance has crumbled at first contact with the prospect of power. For much of the past three weeks the nationalists in Scotland have been screaming blue murder about opposition groups negotiating pacts on local authorities where the SNP are the largest party, to lock them out of office. Such deals between the Tories, Lib Dems and Labour should, perhaps, be unsurprising given that Nicola Sturgeon’s followers are still committed to the break-up of the UK. But that hasn’t stopped the First Minister’s lackeys from crying foul play every time a new deal has been announced. Take South Lanarkshire where the SNP won 27 of the council’s 64 seats but failed to win a majority, despite being the largest party.

‘A disaster’: Six damning revelations from the Afghanistan inquiry

Away from the shenanigans of partygate pictures, a rather more sobering publication has today been released by the Foreign Affairs Committee. The dozen-strong panel of MPs has issued one of the most damning parliamentary reports in modern times, describing Britain's evacuation from Afghanistan as 'a disaster and a betrayal of our allies that will damage the UK’s interests for years to come.' The 66-page report said Afghan allies and British soldiers were 'utterly let down by deep failures of leadership' in the government during last August's evacuation of Afghan translators and others who worked alongside British troops for more than 20 years.

Tory MPs play leadership hokey cokey

It's groundhog day in Westminster, where the leaked images of a No. 10 leaving party have prompted the re-emergence of some of the Prime Minister's most vocal yet indecisive critics. Cometh the hour, cometh the carpers as veteran Sir Roger Gale and Scottish satrap Douglas Ross returned to their familiar place in the headlines yesterday by attacking Boris Johnson once again. Mr S would have much more sympathy with both Gale and Ross if they both didn't seem to keep changing their minds on Johnson's future.  Take Sir Roger – a veteran backbencher and longtime Boris-basher. He submitted a letter of no-confidence in the PM to 1922 chair Sir Graham Brady as far back as May 2020 over his handling of the Barnard Castle affair.

Partygate pictures are finally released

As Westminster waits for Sue Gray to release her report, ITV has got there first. The broadcaster released images this afternoon of one of the Downing Street parties during lockdown – specifically the 13 November 2020 leaving drinks for Lee Cain, Boris Johnson's former director of communications.  Bottles of alcohol and party food are pictured on the table in front of the Prime Minister, with eight people pictured standing closely together, as well as the photographer. In several of the photographs, Boris Johnson appears to be making a speech and raising a toast, with half a glass of fizz in his hands.  On a chair sits his red box, and on the table next to him are two bottles of champagne or cava, four bottles of wine and half a bottle of gin.

Revealed: Durham students’ woke culture commission

It looks like Steerpike's favourite students are it again. Six months after the furore about Rod Liddle's speech at South College, members of Durham University's student body have published a fabulously self-lacerating screed about their seat of learning. For on Friday, Durham’s Students’ Union (SU) released a 48-page 'Culture Commission' which seeks to 'articulate what "Durhamness" really means.' And it transpires that it, er, doesn’t mean much good, given the university’s ‘deep-rooted classism, racism and misogyny’ in the words of its authors.