Nick Newman

Wednesday

21 October 2026

Nick Newman

‘Luckily I was too busy defending cryptobillionaires to be racist or sexist.’

Wednesday

14 October 2026

Nick Newman

‘I’ve conducted a full investigation into myself and found no wrongdoing.’

Wednesday

7 October 2026

Nick Newman

‘Two’s company, three’s a fringe event.’

Wednesday

30 September 2026

Nick Newman

‘Andy Burnham promised huge change.’

Wednesday

23 September 2026

Nick Newman

‘I’m afraid it’s goodbye, Mr Chips, hello, Mr Lentil.’

Wednesday

16 September 2026

Nick Newman

‘Oh no! Don’t axe my triple lock pension.’

Wednesday

9 September 2026

Nick Newman

‘The tea towel is 70 metres long’

Wednesday

26 August 2026

Nick Newman

‘Welcome to our tennis club.’

Wednesday

19 August 2026

Nick Newman

‘And that’s the asylum centre.’

Wednesday

5 August 2026

Nick Newman

Rod alert warning!

Nick Newman

‘If anyone likens me to Infantino, throw them to the sharks.’

Wednesday

22 July 2026

Nick Newman

‘Now for the long, gruelling journey home.’

Wednesday

15 July 2026

Nick Newman

‘Relax, I’m here to make a donation.’

Nick Newman

‘It’s just nice to be somewhere cool.’

Wednesday

1 July 2026

Nick Newman

‘I’m on Brexit benefits.’

Wednesday

24 June 2026

Nick Newman

‘OK, try counting something other than Brexit benefits.’

Wednesday

17 June 2026

Nick Newman

‘Oh no! I’ll lose all my followers.’

Nick Newman

More ChatGPT, Vicar?

Wednesday

10 June 2026

Nick Newman

‘Oh no! There’s no longer one born every minute.’

Wednesday

3 June 2026

Nick Newman

‘I don’t believe in Nicola Sturgeon.’