Matt Percival

‘How do you afford it on your salary?’

‘He thinks filtered is best.’

‘We apologise for the delay – we are still trying to establish a timetable for departures.’

‘She’s extended the ceasefire but the blockade continues.’

‘You failed the vetting process,’

‘We are no longer in dynamic alignment.’

‘He strays a lot further than we thought.’

‘Vet fees.’

And on that bombshell we’ll find out what happens to the oil price tomorrow

‘Your forecast is already out of date.’

‘You’ll have to wait until I’ve gone through your emails.’

‘They want you to release all your messages.’

‘At least the ground rent will be capped at £250.’

‘And on that cliffhanger, we’ll have to wait until tomorrow to find out what happens next.’

From our US edition

‘It’s enlightening but not in a good way.’

From our US edition

It’s enlightening but not in a good way

I prefer something based on a true story

‘We didn’t want dogs.’

From our US edition