Bernie

‘Sending them to Scotland would be a deterrent.’

‘I’m sleeping rough as much as I can before they criminalise it.’

‘I’m escaping from an oppressive regime.’

‘I only converted to help my asylum claim but then things snowballed.’

‘I’m appointing you “chief fundraiser, unpaid”.’

‘Lots of nasty things are making a comeback. Measles, rickets, George Galloway...’

‘She’ll try anything!’

Do you have alcohol-free?

‘No vapes? I’ll just take those knives then.’

‘Do you know we could earn this much being junior doctors?’

‘Just speeding up the compensation process.’

‘The police were very good. They arrived within minutes and said there was nothing they could do.’

‘The wise men departed unto their own country another way.’

‘Isn’t it time you started thinking about Christmas?’

‘You know how you always enjoy a good ghost story on Christmas Eve, Charles?’

‘Frankly it’s a relief to quiz someone who was good at their job.’