And they all lived happily ever after until the invention of the smartphone…
From our UK edition
Wilbur
Wednesday
Monday
And Daddy says can I also ask for a new prime minister?
From our UK edition
Saturday
‘We have a few notes on presentation and delivery.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘Don’t buy tickets for day three of the Ashes Test match.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘You make Rachel Reeves seem decisive.’
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Ah, some good news for once
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘This could be the final nail in the coffin.’
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Bloody immigrants, coming over here, stealing our jobs
From our UK edition
Wednesday
Come on Donald, amuse me
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‘Your horse has bolted? I’m here to close the stable door.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
Did you just heckle me about Prince Andrew?
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‘Move over!’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘Oui, Monsieur President, we’re putting our best man on ze case.’
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I want the credit for this!
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The Belittled Prince
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘This house depresses me. The damp spot’s got worse.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
How desperate are the Tories, on a scale of one to bringing back Boris Johnson?
From our UK edition
‘There’s a new Taylor Swift album’
From our UK edition
I would aim one at the Tory conference but the chances of hitting anyone are remote.
From our UK edition