Steerpike

Steerpike

Steerpike is The Spectator's gossip columnist, serving up the latest tittle tattle from Westminster and beyond. Email tips to steerpike@spectator.co.uk or message @MrSteerpike

Watch: David Davis saved by the bell

David Davis is no stranger to accusations that he has dodged Parliamentary scrutiny over Brexit. This morning though, there was no getting out of an appearance in front of the Brexit select committee. Fortunately for the Brexit secretary however, he was briefly rescued during a tricky exchange about transitional arrangements when his phone went off. Davis scrambled to silence it quickly, before it died in his hands. Mr S. hopes Jean-Claude Juncker doesn't try to get in touch this morning...

No 10’s SpAd gridlock

Rather than re-energise the Tory party as intended, Theresa May's new year reshuffle just exposed her weaknesses and managed to annoy a lot of Conservative MPs in the process. What's more, Mr S understands there is another undesired consequence. Two weeks on and Downing Street is yet to fill a host of special advisor vacancies. Mr S hears murmur of discontent over the way the process is being handled – with complaints of No 10 control-freakery and attempts to thrust candidates on ministers. One aspect of this is a bid to keep the redundancy payments low – so re-appoint those SpAds who lost their jobs rather than go for external hires. But not everyone is playing ball. 'If the government can't manage a basic task like appointing a few SpAds, what does that tell us?

Theresa May’s Burns Night faux pas

Oh dear. On Monday night, the Prime Minister attempted to show her support for the union by throwing a Burns Night supper at No. 10. Although Theresa May gave a short address at the inaugural event, Steerpike understands it fell to David Mundell – the Scottish Secretary – to address the haggis (a 'crispy haggis', served as a starter). Meanwhile, Kristene Hair gave the toast to the laddies. Downing Street has released a list of the guest list for the dinner. https://twitter.com/nickeardleybbc/status/955533585867558913 Alas, there's a problem – or several problems to be more precise. Downing Street spelled at least five of the guests’ names wrong, including three Conservative MPs – Andrew Bowie, David Duguid and Ross Thomson.

Labour Against the Witchhunt welcome Corbynista’s appointment as chair of Disputes Panel

Talk of trigger ballots, deselection and factional manoeuvres is rife in the Labour party after three Momentum candidates were elected on the party's NEC – tipping the balance in favour of the Corbynistas. Since that election, the NEC moved swiftly to vote to oust Ann Black as chair of the Disputes Panel in favour of Christine Shawcroft. The panel is responsibly for deciding whether to investigate sexist, racist, homophobic and anti-semitic abuse - and given that Shawcroft herself was suspended from the party in 2015 (for publicly supporting disgraced Tower Hamlets mayor Lutfur Rahman), many moderates are concerned over her appointment and what it means for Labour's disciplinary procedure going forward.

Nicholas Soames joins the Boles rebellion

On Friday night, Nick Boles set the cat among the pigeons when he tweeted his frustrations at Theresa May's timid government: https://twitter.com/NickBoles/status/954409789152514049 With Boles not a typical rebel, his complaints appear to mirror what many MPs have been saying privately. Now, Nicholas Soames has spoken out. Winston Churchill's grandson has joined Boles in using hashtags to criticise Theresa May. Soames says '#wherestheboldandbravesofaritsdulldulldull' needed to beat the 'Corbini': https://twitter.com/NSoames/status/955386579895373825 Expect more critical MPs to come out of the woodwork in the coming days.

Viral Question Time audience member turns out to be a Labour council candidate

Here we go again. The stand out moment of the latest Question Time saw a young woman accuse a Tory minister of purposefully underfunding the NHS in order to  make the argument for privatisation. The exchange left Margot James, a DCMS minister, insisting that she was 'not a liar' and calling out the accusations as false. Since then, the clip of the young woman taking James to task has been widely shared online. Only all is not what it seems. It turns out that the audience member is not your average viewer. In fact, Rebecca Shirazi is a local Labour party candidate. Corbynista Laura Pidcock has been tweeting her praises: https://twitter.com/LauraPidcockMP/status/954345709616103424 So much for playing fair...

Sorry seems to be the hardest word for John McDonnell

Although John McDonnell is supposed to play a key part in Jeremy Corbyn's drive for a kinder, gentler politics, remarks he made about ‘lynching’ Esther McVey, at a Remembrance Sunday event back in 2014, continue to distract from the message. McDonnell's defence is that he was quoting someone else who (he claims) wanted to lynch her – rather than wanting to lynch her himself. This morning on the Andrew Marr show, McDonnell was given the chance to apologise for his comments. Alas, he declined: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFdOzPOtnvc It seems sorry really is the hardest word... Readers can listen for themselves here.

Diane Abbott’s Brexit confusion – part II

Here we go again. For some time now Labour's Brexit confusion can be described as 'complicated' at best. Matters aren't helped by the fact that Labour shadow cabinet members often go on the airwaves and contradict each others – sometimes even themselves. This was evidenced last month took to the Andrew Marr show to claim that Labour had never supported a second referendum – despite writing to a constituent to say she would argue for the 'right of the electorate to vote on any deal that is finally agreed'. Now it seems Labour's ever-changing Brexit position is getting too much even for Abbott.

Caption contest: Putin in cold water

Next week at Davos, world leaders – including President Trump and Emmanuel Macron – will gather at the elite meet-up to flex their diplomatic muscles and prove how big a player they are on the global stage. Happily, Vladimir Putin has offered them an early lesson in how to show you're a hard man. The Russian president joined millions of Orthodox believers in plunging bare-chested into icy water – with the temperature below -5C – in a Russian tradition marking the Epiphany. Captions in the comments please.

New Tory vice-chair culls ‘white public schoolboy’ Remainer from candidate list

With the new Tory vice-chairman for youth, Ben Bradley, currently making headlines for ill-judged blog posts from 2012, it's safe to say that Theresa May's plan to revamp CCHQ by appointing 13 MPs as vice-chairs, hasn't gone entirely to plan. However, one vice chairman is determined to make a success of her brief – no matter the cost. Step forward Kemi Badenoch. The MP for Saffron Walden has been put in charge of selecting Conservative candidates for the 2022 general election. However, in this week’s edition of The House magazine, Badenoch reveals that her first task consisted of knocking a white public schoolboy off the list.

Karen Bradley gets on the wrong side of the DUP

Oh dear. Although Karen Bradley has only been in her new job as Secretary of State for Northern Ireland for just over a week, she has already managed to ruffle a few feathers. Unfortunately for her, those feathers belong to the all-powerful DUP. It's been reported that in a sit down with written press this morning, Bradley indicated that 'release of the £1 billion from DUP/Tory confidence & supply deal at Westminster is contingent on ministers being in place at Stormont'. However, this is news to Nigel Dodds – the DUP's Westminster leader. He has taken to social media to voice his concern that this is 'not correct': Hasn't anyone told Bradley the first rule of good governance? Never mess with the DUP.

Labour embrace Jared O’Mara

It's been a difficult week for Ben Bradley, the new Tory vice chair for youth. In unearthed blog posts dating back to 2012, Bradley suggested that benefit claimants should have vasectomies rather than claim multiple child benefits, accused public sector workers of being 'lost in their own fantasy land' and said that in the case of the London riots that: 'For once I think police brutality should be encouraged.' Bradley has been quick to apologise for his comments – claiming he has matured since then. But this isn't good enough for Labour. The party has been quick to go on the attack and hail this as evidence that the 'nasty party' lives on. However, Mr S suspects they would be well-advised to tread with caution.

Paul Mason’s elite panic

Oh dear. After three Momentum candidates – including key Corbyn ally Jon Lansman – were elected to Labour’s national executive committee on Monday, the NEC swiftly moved to oust Ann Black as chair of the Disputes Panel in favour of Christine Shawcroft. Given that Shawcroft was previously suspended by the party in 2015, the move has raised alarm bells in the Labour party. However, should you be concerned that Shawcroft is now responsible for deciding whether to investigate sexist, racist, homophobic and anti-semitic abuse, you're probably just a member of the elite. Or at least that's what Paul Mason thinks.

Watch: Ken Clarke sends fellow Tory MP to sleep

Ken Clarke is back on his feet talking about Brexit in the Commons again – but his speech has not gone down well with all of his colleagues. Sitting behind him, his fellow Tory MP Sir Desmond Swayne struggled to stay awake as Clarke talked about the rights of EU citizens. Swayne even appeared to nod off at one point. Mr S thinks Swayne could be forgiven for thinking he had heard it all before...

Andrea Leadsom sees green over Gove

Whether it's authentic or not, the Conservative party is going green. Following Michael Gove's reinvention as resident eco-warrior, the party has been pushing green policies – from extending plastic bag charges to saving trees in Sheffield – in a bid to prove they care. Today Gove's Cabinet colleagues were brought into the fold – each being gifted a re-usable coffee cup this morning at Cabinet. However, could it be another Cabinet member who is really behind the green revolution? Step forward Andrea Leadsom. It's been remarked to Mr S that Gove's predecessor in Defra 'never misses the chance' to mention that many of good news green initiatives coming from that department were started when she was Defra Secretary.

John Humphrys, equal pay crusader

It's been an awkward week or so for John Humphrys. The Today programme presenter – who is thought to earn over £600,000 per annum – found himself in the naughty corner when an audio surfaced of Humphrys appearing to make light of his colleague Carrie Gracie's decision to stand down as China editor over 'pay discrimination'. His comments were met with fury by many BBC colleagues concerned over the corporation's gender pay gap. So let's spare a minute to pay tribute the bright spark at the Beeb who decided it would be a good idea to get Humphrys to grill the Guardian's Katharine Viner over potential gender pay imbalance at the Grauniad.

John Bercow lectures Gavin Williamson on the perils of press briefings

Ever since Gavin Williamson was appointed Defence Secretary, there has been a briefing war between the Ministry of Defence and the Treasury over defence spending. Keen to prove his defence credentials, Williamson – or Private Pike as the Chancellor's allies prefer to refer to him – has hardly discouraged backbench MPs from kicking up a fuss over planned cuts to his department. With cost-cutting proposals for the military leaked – including plans to axe 11,000 Army troops and 2,000 Royal Marines – just days ago, this afternoon Williamson was summoned to the Commons to answer an urgent question from Julian Lewis on the reported plans in the review.

Eddie Izzard left out in the cold… again

Here we go again. The results of the latest election for Labour's National Executive Committee are in and it's a clear run for Momentum. The three members selected are all Momentum candidates: Jon Lansman, Yasmine Dar and Rachel Garnham. Alas, not everyone is a winner. Or more precisely, Eddie Izzard is not a winner. The comedian-turned-aspiring-politician has missed out on a place on the NEC for the second time – coming in fourth. https://twitter.com/jonlansman/status/952870325733285888 Still, Mr S could have predicted this would happen. Every campaign the cross-dressing comedian attaches himself to has a tendency to end in failure.

The economics of fish and chips

When you pay £8 for fish and chips, where does the money go? That's the question one restaurant has been busy answering after a customer left a two-star review on Facebook. It wasn't that there was anything wrong with the food – in fact it was 'lovely' and the staff were 'amazing'. But Debbie Davies still felt the need to complain to Oxton Bar and Kitchen over the price for the meal – £8. Happily, staff at the restaurant were happy to provide clarity: 'Ok Debbie. Where do I begin? Out of that £8, our nasty government is charging you 20% vat which we collect by law on their behalf, so we’re left with £6.66.

Listen: John McDonnell’s comments about Esther McVey being lynched

The return of Esther McVey to the Cabinet is bad news for John McDonnell and Labour's claim of a kinder, gentler politics. It has led many hacks and broadcasters to return to remarks he made about 'lynching' McVey, at a Remembrance Sunday event back in 2014. But when they do so, Labour complain. The shadow chancellor's defence is that he was quoting someone else who (he claims) wanted to lynch her – rather than wanting to lynch her himself. Happily, for clarity's sake, the Sunday Politics today aired the recording: https://twitter.com/daily_politics/status/952504692684173313 Mr S will leave it to readers to judge for themselves...