‘He came off Snowzempic.’
Nick Newman
Friday
Wednesday
You can tell the Chinese government that we strongly object to their super embassy
From our UK edition
‘I’ve come as Sheriff Jenrick.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘He came off Snowzempic.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
We’re doing Dry January – giving up water and sticking to alcohol
From our UK edition
‘It’s America Thirst.’
From our UK edition
Monday
You haven’t got a lot on, Sire
From our UK edition
‘Keir Starmer surviving has given me great hope for the future!’
From our UK edition
Monday
‘He’s not getting another present until we get a thank-you letter!’
From our UK edition
‘Is our flu coming to you, or is your flu coming to us?’
From our UK edition
Saturday
‘Are you a reliable news service or a propaganda outlet?’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘It’s undermining justice, deciding if I’m naughty or nice without a jury.’
From our UK edition
This black hole, Chancellor – is it in the room with us now?
From our UK edition
Wednesday
‘I’m waiting till Black Friday to do all my Christmas shoplifting.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
Wednesday
‘The driver’s gone to jail so he’s kept the engine running.’
From our UK edition
‘Misleading, deceptive, inaccurate – and that’s just the weather.’
From our UK edition
Wednesday
If the Chinese know what we’re doing perhaps they could let us know
From our UK edition
