Cockburn

Cockburn

Mischief, mayhem and Washington gossip. Send tips and party invites to cockburn@thespectator.com.

Kari Lake grabs the headlines

From our US edition

Choking up with the Faith and Freedom Coalition Imagine a venue where you can watch Kane from WWE following up Vivek Ramaswamy. That’s where Cockburn finds himself this Friday morning: in the ballroom of the Washington Hilton at the Faith and Freedom Coalition’s Road to the Majority Conference. Sound like a mouthful? Cockburn is counting the mentions of the left’s agenda being “rammed down our throats” (two so far — is this a biblical reference?). Seven presidential candidates are speaking today. So far Cockburn’s clocked Vivek, Mike Pence, Tim Scott and Francis Suarez — unforgivably he missed Asa Hutchinson after getting wrapped up in conversation with a trafficking advocate (anti) in the entryway.

kari lake

Inside Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert’s catfight on the House floor

From our US edition

The gloves were off in the House of Representatives this week after Georgia congressman Marjorie Taylor Greene called her Colorado colleague Lauren Boebert “a little bitch.” The gruesome twosome used to be thick as thieves. What happened?  The fight erupted over impeachment articles that Boebert introduced Tuesday and tried unsuccessfully to force a vote on. Greene, who drafted her impeachment articles in 2021 and again this May, publicly accused Boebert of copying. On Wednesday, Boebert again tried unsuccessfully to force a vote on her impeachment resolution.  During the vote, Boebert confronted Greene over comments the congresswoman had made to the press. C-SPAN’s camera’s caught part of the exchange in a center aisle of the House floor.

lauren boebert marjorie taylor greene
elon musk mark zuckerberg cage fight

The people deserve a Mark Zuckerberg-Elon Musk cage fight in Vegas

From our US edition

Just when you thought toxic masculinity was dead: Emmanuel Macron chugs a beer and Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg agree to a cage fight.  Elon Musk tweeted Wednesday that he was "up for a cage fight" with Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg — to which Zuck replied on his Instagram Story, "send me location.” Musk came back with: "Vegas Octagon,” the fenced-in area used for Ultimate Fighting Championship bouts in Las Vegas, Nevada. Musk also tweeted "I'm gonna use a move called 'The Walrus', where I just lie on you, and you can't get away” and "I almost never work out, except for picking up my kids & throwing them in the air." https://twitter.

Is Kamala Harris the new Tina Turner?

From our US edition

Kamala Harris wants you to know how much she loves Tina Turner. She loves her so much that she has wonderfully unique and joyous memories of listening to the Queen of Rock ’n’ Roll’s most famous hits growing up. “When I was a child, my mother would play “Proud Mary” on repeat as I danced around our living room, singing along into my toy microphone at the top of my lungs,” Harris wrote. Harris revealed this moment of rare vulnerability in a tribute to Turner published in Rolling Stones Tuesday. And reading Kamala’s tribute, Cockburn can’t help but think she considers herself the heir to Turner’s legacy. The constant sexism and racism that Turner overcame in the music industry must have inspired a young Harris’s calls for “Fweedom.

tina turner

Emmanuel Macron accused of ‘toxic masculinity’ for slowly chugging Corona

From our US edition

Join Cockburn in a thought experiment. Close your eyes — and think of the phrase “toxic masculinity.” Who is the first person that you picture in your head? Recently charged Andrew Tate, perhaps — or maybe Floyd Mayweather. French Member of Parliament Sandrine Rousseau sees someone a little less likely: Monsieur Le President Emmanuel Macron. Macron was filmed downing a bottle of Corona this weekend in the dressing rooms of the Stade de France, after Toulouse had beaten La Rochelle in the French rugby final. Urged on by victorious Toulouse players, the president necks the bottle of beer in a modest seventeen seconds. https://twitter.com/chufl3t3r0/status/1670501095502757888?

emmanuel macron chugs beer toxic masculinity

Flashback: Meghan Markle gets staffers to conduct podcast interviews for her

From our US edition

Back in November, Cockburn wrote an entry of his gossip column titled "Meghan Markle: America’s laziest interviewer." While the piece may not have popular at the time, especially with Meghan’s #girlboss fans, boy does Cockburn feel vindicated now. It has recently come to light that while many were eagerly awaiting the one-hour-a-week podcast where the duchess investigated, dissected and subverts the labels that try to hold women back, Meghan Markle isn’t exactly the workaholic boss babe she made out — and Spotify has realized.  Last week, Spotify released a joint statement with Archewell Audio, Meghan and Harry's content creation label, announcing that "Spotify and Archewell Audio have mutually agreed to part ways and are proud of the series we made together.

meghan markle podcast

Taylor Lorenz was right all along

From our US edition

Journalists are OUT, influencers are IN. That’s the chief finding from a new report by the Reuters Institute at the University of Oxford, which discovered that 55 percent of TikTok and Snapchat users, and 52 percent of Instagram users, get their news from “personalities,” compared to 33-42 percent who get it from mainstream media outlets or journalists on the same platforms. “This Reuters study once again validates what I have been saying for over a decade,” Taylor Lorenz told Cockburn, “content creators are the new media and it’s been that way for a while.” The Washington Post columnist has long banged the drum about the importance of emerging social media platforms and the importance of members of the media cultivating brands on them.

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Is Mayor Francis Suarez too ‘woke’ for the GOP?

From our US edition

Miami mayor Francis Suarez is running for president, and his opponents already have plenty of attack ad images. The Cuban-American Republican with leading man style might have checked the boxes for an early 2010s GOP. Now it’s 2023 — and it seems no one told Suave Suarez that posing with a Pride flag-emblazoned mayoral sash is way out of style. Suarez’s Twitter feed is littered with rainbow flag paraphernalia. In June 2021, Suarez posted a video pledging Miami’s support of Pride Month. https://twitter.com/FrancisSuarez/status/1403449097453985798 The year prior, Suarez signed an “LGBTQ ordinance” to recognize “the decades of contributions by the LGBTQ Miami residents to the economy and diversity of the city!

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Trans White House flasher’s rack confuses conservative radio hosts

From our US edition

It only took one hot trans woman flashing her breasts in front of the White House to topple the GOP’s anti-trans agenda.  After President Biden banned transgender activist Rose Montoya from future White House events for going topless on the South Lawn, some conservatives have taken to social media to declare their admiration for her. For the most part, this bold display of equity and inclusion has taken the form of middle-aged men slavering over her bust. “That tranny that flashed everyone at the White House looked pretty good and I’m tired of pretending he didn’t,” tweeted alpha male pundit Jesse Kelly yesterday. “I’m with you,” radio host Clay Travis responded. “Great boobs. And I don’t think I’d know that was a dude.

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Topless trans guests reveal systemic inequality at the White House

From our US edition

The White House lawn became the latest battleground in the “Free the Nipple” fight this weekend.  A shocking display of inequality was captured on video when TikTok influencer and trans woman Rose Montoya filmed herself topless in front of the White House, flaunting her breasts during a Pride event. Montoya was joined by two trans male activists who were also shirtless. Yet only Montoya — whether out of a sense of decency or internalized social pressures — censored her nipples with her hands. For all the White House's moral posturing, Cockburn is shocked they would tolerate such brazen inequality.

Rose Montoya takes her shirt off on the White House lawn (Rose Montoya/TikTok)

The GOP ballot harvesting bonanza has begun

From our US edition

A year after getting its clock cleaned thanks in large part due to abdicating mail-in ballots, everyone in the Republican Party is getting in on the ballot harvesting action. One of the latest entrants is Turning Point USA, which, through its Turning Point Action 501c4 plans to build the “first ever conservative ballot-chasing army,” according to plans obtained by The Spectator — and it won’t come cheap; Turning Point Action estimates that the total cost of its operation will be $108.6 million.

maricopa county ballot harvesting

Boris gives parting honor to hairdresser

From our US edition

The most surprising part about Boris Johnson's honors list, which allows him to approve lifetime peerages and other awards for his allies, is that he has included his hairdresser. That's right, the famous blonde mop isn’t just something that he wakes up with, but rather an intentional look crafted by House of Commons hairdresser Kelly Jo Dodge, who is set to get a Member of the Order of the British Empire (MBE) from the former UK prime minister. Johnson is standing down as a Member of Parliament after receiving a report into "Partygate" scandal. The honors announcement, needless to say, has turned heads. It was approved by British prime minister Rishi Sunak on Friday, along with almost forty honors and seven peerages.

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Has Mark Meadows shopped Trump to the Justice Department?

From our US edition

The speculation in Trumpworld surrounding Mark Meadows, and whether the former congressman and White House chief of staff handed Special Counsel Jack Smith the tools he needed to indict the former president, continues to rise.  It’s already known that Meadows’s staff was the source of an audio recording where the former president made comments about the classified documents he took from the White House — they recorded an interview in July 2021 at Bedminster for Meadows’s memoir about his time in the White House, The Chief’s Chief, which you can purchase at Amazon in hardcover for a very modest $8.07. Trump discussed a document, one that he said he ought to have declassified before leaving the White House, about potentially attacking Iran.

Behind the Trump-DeSantis influencer Twitter bloodbath

From our US edition

Forget the campaign trail: the real Trump-DeSantis fight is spilling out on Twitter. Conservative influencers who support the respective campaigns are duking it out on Elon Musk's app — and it's getting personal. The Twitter beef ostensibly started with Trump supporters growing antsy over the prospect of a "disloyal" DeSantis running against the president who swung his governor's race, then devolved into policy fights over DeSantis and Trump's handling of the Covid-19 pandemic and Trump's ability to win the general. The arguments have since spiraled into nasty scuttlebutt. One prominent example featured New York Young Republicans chairman Gavin Wax and a handful of DeSantis surrogates.

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Flashback: Donald Trump predicted the PGA-LIV merger a year ago

From our US edition

The PGA Tour will officially merge with LIV Golf, the Saudi-backed golf league, in a shock bid to squash the antitrust lawsuits brewing between the two corporations. It’s a surprising move considering the PGA Tour executives and some of their high-profile players, such as Rory McIlroy, spent the past year morally shaming the pros who defected. But one man who was not shocked was former president Donald Trump, whose organization hosts LIV events at his courses. In July 2022, Trump wrote on Truth Social: All those golfers who remain "loyal" to the very disloyal PGA, in all its different forms, will pay a big price when the inevitable MERGER with LIV comes, and you get nothing but a big "thank you" from PGA officials who are making Millions of Dollars a year.

Taylor Swift dumps British man, again

From our US edition

Swifties rejoice! Or, at least, stop self-harming. Taylor Swift and 1975 singer Matt Healy are officially over. A friend close to the couple told TMZ that Taylor is in fact "single" again. It's still unclear exactly why they've now split up. A source told Entertainment Tonight that: "Taylor and Matty broke up. They are both extremely busy and realized they're not really compatible with each other. "The source added that "Taylor's friends want what's best for her and aren't shocked that their relationship fizzled out since she recently got out of a long-term relationship." It was a pretty wild romance. Just last month, Matty was spotted at all three of Swift's Nashville concerts.

taylor swift matty healy

Can ‘anti-woke’ boycotts fix the obesity crisis?

From our US edition

Conservatives just discovered the surest cure for America’s obesity epidemic: boycotts.  On Tuesday morning, Chick-fil-A became the latest casualty in the Bud Light War when a Twitter mob began calling for a boycott of the fast food chain gone “woke.” The outrage followed a viral tweet highlighting that the company had hired a vice president of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion. “We have a problem,” tweeted conservative commentator Joey Mannarino on Monday. “Chick-Fil-A just hired a VP of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion. This is bad. Very bad. I don’t want to have to boycott. Are we going to have to boycott?” Cockburn certainly does not want to give up his weekly chicken sandwich!

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Elvis’s cousin Brandon delays marriage months before his election

From our US edition

A distant cousin of Elvis Presley is running as a Democrat to be governor of Mississippi. And much like the King of Rock and Roll, Brandon Presley can’t help falling in love — at the most politically expedient times.  Just days before his campaign season wedding to Katelyn Mabus was scheduled, he scrambled to let invitees know that his show will not in fact go on. Presley, a lifelong bachelor, has been running for office since he was a young man. He was elected mayor of his North Mississippi town at twenty-four years old and has served as an elected energy regulator since.  In December 2022, just twenty-four days before announcing that he’d be challenging Governor Tate Reeves in an attempt to turn Mississippi blue, he had an even more special announcement.

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Have the LA Dodgers struck out?

From our US edition

Mad Joe Manchin yells at journos Senator Joe Manchin is furious — and he’s letting reporters know. Sources close to the West Virginia senator tell Cockburn that Manchin is fuming over a recent article in Fox News giving credit to House Republicans, and not Manchin, for the approval of the Mountain Valley Pipeline. The new major pipeline could help Manchin politically as he faces a perilous path to reelection next year. “Manchin is furiously calling reporters himself to push back on it,” according to a West Virginia source, despite that “the truth is that he played a relatively minor role in finally getting MVP done.

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Explaining Prince Harry’s costly legal spree

From our US edition

“A person should not just be able to buy special police services,” Prince Harry was told last week after losing a legal challenge over the UK Home Office’s decision to not allow the government to pay for his security when visiting Britain. The man that begged for the world to see him as "Just Harry, drop the prince," had to be reminded that the Metropolitan Police was not for hire, and that privately-funded protection would undermine public confidence in London’s police force. This is just one of the ongoing court battles that Harry has on his plate at the moment. It seems that tending to his chickens, being hired on as "Chief Impact Officer" at a hippy-dippy wellness company BetterUp and taking part in his worldwide privacy tour is less time consuming than one might think.