‘Uncle Andrew?’
From our UK edition
‘Uncle Andrew?’
Bernie
Thursday
It’s a somewhat reduced service
From our UK edition
‘It’s a somewhat reduced service.’
Thursday
Straight to the beach
From our UK edition
‘So, with the lockdown relaxed, I headed straight to the beach.’
Thursday
Happiest days of your life
From our UK edition
‘You’ll remember school as the happiest days of your life.’
Thursday
At least the sun is out
From our UK edition
Thursday
Work from work
From our UK edition
‘Are you sure there’s no way I can work from work?’
Thursday
I’ve been waiting for four hours
From our UK edition
‘I’ve been waiting for four hours and I still haven’t seen a patient.’
Thursday
Burberry has arrived
From our UK edition
‘I see the Burberry has arrived.’
That’s an awful lot of issues
From our UK edition
‘That’s an awful lot of issues.’
Thursday
More wildlife in the garden
From our UK edition
‘Have you noticed we’re getting more wildlife in the garden?’
Are we nearly there?
From our UK edition
‘Are we nearly there?’
Thursday
Strictly no picnics
From our UK edition
If you find any PPE
From our UK edition
‘If you find any PPE you get to keep it.’
Saturday
They haven’t got any of the basics
From our UK edition
‘They haven’t got any of the basics — beer, wine, gin, vodka...’
Saturday
Closed for the emergency
From our UK edition
‘I thought they were key workers.’
Mr Tickle and Mr Nosey
From our UK edition
Mr Tickle and Mr Nosey have a problem with the two-metres-apart rule
What Boris meant
From our UK edition
‘I somehow don’t believe this is what Boris meant.’
Saturday
That ought to reduce the death toll
From our UK edition
‘That ought to reduce the death toll.’
Saturday
The paper’s more optimistic this morning
From our UK edition
‘The paper’s more optimistic this morning.’
