The great nineteenth-century novelist Harold Frederic (The Damnation of Theron Ware) had a character complain “I cannot read or listen to the inflated accounts” of the role played in the Revolution by Massachusetts and Virginia “without smashing my pipe in wrath.” Frederic’s pipe-smasher would smoke in peaceful raptness while reading Alan Pell Crawford’s engrossing new book, This Fierce People: The Untold Story of America’s Revolutionary War in the South.
Bitches get a bad rap. In his new book, Ferocious Ambition, film historian Robert Dance recontextualizes the life, career and artistry of the most notorious bitch of them all, Joan Crawford. Crawford’s early twentieth-century rivals have faded into history (outside of the gayest of gay kids, does any Gen Z-er know the name Norma Shearer?), but Crawford is omnipresent for all the wrong reasons. Ryan Murphy reenacts her feuds on FX’s Feud. Drag queens imitate Crawford running around with an ax. And, every Mother’s Day, bloggers roll out posts and memes about her legacy as the worst mom of all time; the titular Mommie Dearest of Faye Dunaway’s campy, classic, child-abuse shlockfest.
On the Who’s 1965 single “My Generation,” the band’s twenty-one-year-old lead singer Roger Daltrey half-sang, half-sneered, “Hope I die before I get old.” The song, written by the then-twenty-year-old Peter Townshend, has remained a classic for nearly sixty years, boasting both a fantastic tune and unforgettable lyrics. Yet even as the Who continue to tour the world — often in the company of that invaluable accessory for any self-regarding rock band, a full orchestra — it is now with self-aware amusement that the seventy-nine-year-old Daltrey and seventy-eight-year-old Townshend perform it.
After a relatively quiet few weeks at the US box office, now that the Barbenheimer phenomenon has finally receded from view, it has fallen to another all-conquering icon to drag audiences back to theaters in their millions. Yes, Taylor Swift is no longer content with conquering stadia, but has now managed to establish herself as an unparalleled draw for the big screen as well, with Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour opening in American cinemas. With a first weekend gross of $97 million, it will either be the highest October launch since Joker in 2019, or even surpass it. Not bad for something made on a budget of no more than $20 million, self-produced by Swift herself and bypassing studios to be distributed directly to theaters.
It is nearly twenty years since the most iconic moment in modern music history: when Madonna, aged forty-five, made out with two women nearly half her age on the MTV Video Music Awards stage. Britney Spears, who was twenty-one, and Christina Aguilera, twenty-two, were pounced on in front of millions of television viewers, along with an uncomfortable looking Justin Timberlake and Guy Ritchie. Two decades later and Madonna would likely be canceled for sexual harassment, with Britney and Xtina offered therapy and a book deal to “speak their truth.” But in August 2003, Madonna pulling off a garter from Aguilera's leg, frenching Spears and then giving Aguilera a smacker on the lips was a standard Saturday night watch.
Madonna Louise Veronica Ciccone is embarking on her first greatest-hits tour, but she has forgotten why she was great. In her announcement video for the Celebration Tour, celebrating the fortieth anniversary of Madonna’s self-titled debut, the queen of pop and a random assortment of B-list celebrities — Jack Black, Amy Schumer, Diplo and Meg Stalter, to name a few — reminisced about the queen of pop fellating an Evian bottle in her documentary Truth or Dare. A few days later, Madonna introduced Sam Smith’s and Kim Petras’s striptease at the Grammys. “Are you ready for a little controversy?” Madonna screamed at the crowd, holding a dominatrix cane in the air. The audience was too bored to respond.
"I’ve had an extraordinary life, I must make an extraordinary film," Madonna told Variety in July, as she described her decision to helm her own biopic as a "preemptive strike" against the men who wanted to tell her story. That was last summer, when there were reports of a months-long "Madonna bootcamp" led by casting director Carmen Cuba, which included eleven-hour choreography sessions, where everyone from Florence Pugh, Alexa Demie, Bebe Rexha, Odessa Young and Sky Ferreira auditioned to play the "Material Girl." Madonna said she wanted the role to go to someone who could "convey the incredible journey that life has taken me on as an artist, a musician, a dancer...the focus of this film will always be music.
Any moment now, I expect Taylor Swift to announce a presidential bid, probably for 2028. By then, she’ll have done everything else that someone in the entertainment industry could reasonably be expected to have done. Endless hit records and awards? Check. High-profile spats with leading industry figures who have invariably come off worse? Absolutely. And, next up, her cinematic debut, a yet-untitled project that she will both write and direct? Not long to wait now. The announcement a few days ago that Swift will direct a feature for Searchlight Pictures based on her own screenplay caused much excitement, with appropriate genuflection accompanying the press release.
Another day, another celebrity coming out on the internet. Madonna is the latest: this weekend, the pop icon posted a video on TikTok with the caption, “If I miss, I’m Gay.” The singer then tosses her underwear towards a waste basket, misses and then gestures “Oh well.” https://www.tiktok.com/@madonna/video/7152605555830426923?_t=8WQ5cXPY0Zi&_r=1 Some fans are sending their support for the sixty-four-year-old, who has long been a gay icon. But others are speculating that Madonna is just jumping on the latest bandwagon. Cockburn laughed out loud at a tweet that read, "Doesn’t Madonna do this once every couple of hundred years?" Cockburn has noticed that it now seems passé to be straight, as many ladies scramble to get out of the "straight white woman" box.
The life story of Madonna Louise Ciccone is one of the most interesting real-life narratives of any twentieth-century star. From her Michigan origins to her world-conquering career as "Queen of Pop" and her continual, Bowie-esque reinventions, she has lasted decades in a notoriously fickle industry through a combination of chutzpah, publicity savvy and talent, to say nothing of allying herself with some extremely talented collaborators along the way. "It’d make a great film," people have said repeatedly. But what they should have quickly added is, "But Madonna herself must not write and direct it." It is a problem that only people at the highest, Olympian levels of fame face, but nobody will say no to them, no matter how stupid their ideas.
As soon as the lockdown guidelines were announced across the UK last week, I made the decision to move back in with my parents. As you can imagine after three years at university, this has been a somewhat challenging situation to adjust to! It has been made even more testing due to the fact father has had to lay off many of the staff due to them calling in sick. We are down to one cook and a mere handful of cleaners. It’s a nightmare! Thankfully we have a solid internet connection and I have been able to occupy myself on social media the past few days. I say ‘occupy’, but that’s more of an understatement. It’s been more of an essential lifeline to me.
