More from The Week

Parliament of spivs…

This week, the nation beholds Parliament with a collective contempt unrivalled in living memory. We need a modern-day Trollope to do justice to this wave of revulsion, triggered by the remarkable revelations in the Telegraph. Gilbert Burnet, the great ecclesiastical and political historian of his time, wrote of the corrupt MPs elected in 1710 that ‘this is the worst Parliament I ever saw’. And so it seems in 2009: the Palace of Westminster is home not to an ancient institution but to a disgraced rabble of second-rate spivs who have dishonoured the public trust as flagrantly as they have raided the public purse.

…and a Prince of good sense

At a moment of such alarming disconnection between the political class and the electorate, it is cheering to be reminded that not every part of our constitution is faltering, or at odds with the grain of public opinion. On Tuesday, the Prince of Wales addressed the Royal Institute of British Architects, 25 years after his famous attack on the proposed National Gallery extension as a ‘monstrous carbuncle’. At the time, he was mocked as a fogey and a reactionary. But his cry from the heart against the vandalism wrought by modern architecture proved to be the act of a popular tribune — not least because it reflected common sense as opposed to Corbusian delusion.

An outbreak of common sense

We did not need to be told to keep calm and carry on — that seems to be our instinctive, collective British reaction to crises. In the case of swine flu, as with bird flu, (or even Spanish flu) the public has reacted with commendable common sense. There has been no mass absenteeism from work, no fad for face-masks; not even the closure of schools has provoked a panic. The national mood was summed up by the infected schoolgirl who announced that it was actually no worse than having a cold. Even the 24-hour news channels, though desperate for any story that can fill their air time, have given up trying to whip people up into a swine-flu fever.

The New Avenger

The Prime Minister’s epic catalogue of early summer mishaps, mistakes and misjudgments lengthens by the day: if he is not making a fool of himself on YouTube, he is misreading the mood of the Commons on MPs’ expenses, or posing in front of swastikas. But, as wretched as they are, these incidents pale into insignificance compared to one truly monstrous strategic error: Number 10’s failure to acknowledge Joanna Lumley’s requests for a private meeting with the PM. Part of New Labour’s political genius in its early years was to hoist a Big Tent, a welcoming canvas which stretched over everyone with influence.

The panic pandemic

‘In 1918, half a million Americans died. The projections are that this time, the virus will kill one million Americans.’ These were the words of the President’s chief health adviser, as he warned about the dangers of swine flu. But he wasn’t speaking this week. The year was 1976, the President was Ford, and the adviser had, it transpired, overestimated the death toll by 999,999. Swine flu has already proved more lethal this time round. There are 152 probable deaths in Mexico (though only 20 cases are confirmed) and 1,614 sufferers under observation there. At the time of writing two British cases have been confirmed, with another 14 being investigated. But the lessons of 1976 are just as relevant today. In the words of the late Douglas Adams: don’t panic.

A 30-year blip?

Thirty years ago this Sunday, Margaret Thatcher was elected Prime Minister with a Commons majority of 43. In the 11 years that followed, she took an economic basket case, the sick man of Europe, an offshore banana republic, and transformed it: inflation was curbed, penal tax ended, the unions tamed, and Britain’s confidence on the world stage reasserted by victory in the Falkland Islands and the strength of the Iron Lady’s alliance with President Reagan. Her greatest achievement, paradoxically, was to transform not one party but two: New Labour was the offspring of Thatcherism too.

The pips squeak

On Budget Day, Alistair Darling achieved something rare among chancellors of the exchequer and unique among members of this Labour government. He actually made us feel sorry for him. By common consensus, he faced — with a stoical calm that has come to be admired even by his opponents — an almost impossible job. Markets and taxpayers wanted him to unveil a strategy to set the public finances on a long-term path back towards fiscal balance without crushing fragile indications of a distant recovery. The Prime Minister clearly wanted him to regain some political ground by being seen to address the sharply rising rate of job losses, while dishing out some fiscal punishment to the rich in a way that would trip up the Tories.

Lies, damned lies, and emails

In his long preparations for next Wednesday’s Budget, Alistair Darling must have constantly asked himself: could the challenge possibly be more gruelling? The task facing the Chancellor was always going to be formidable: he cannot go on borrowing without limit, amassing undreamed-of fiscal deficits in order to maintain inflated levels of public spending. Indeed, the danger point is fast approaching at which the gilts market will no longer absorb the torrent of new debt, and an IMF bail-out will become a serious prospect. As Frank Field warns on page 10, this Chancellor or his successor will clearly be obliged to put a freeze on day-to-day spending, and take an axe to a range of pet government projects and quangos.

An expense we cannot afford

The naming and shaming of MPs who are abusing the expenses system is becoming a Sunday ritual. Each week the papers carry a fresh set of revelations; each week public cynicism about our elected representatives becomes more deeply entrenched. This would be bad enough if the MPs involved in these scandals were merely time-serving backbenchers. But the culprits include the holders of some of the great offices of state. Worst of all, the guilty seem incapable of seeing what is wrong with their presumption that the public should pay for everything from their bath plugs to their holiday homes.

Nostradarling

As Oscar Wilde quipped of Little Nell’s death, you would have to have a heart of stone not to laugh. On 24 November, Alistair Darling told the Commons: ‘I, too, am forecasting that output will continue to fall in the UK, for the first two quarters of [2009]. But then, because of decisions taken in this Pre-Budget Report, I expect it to start to recover.’ This prophecy seemed preposterous enough at the time, as we pointed out immediately on our Coffee House blog. Four and half months later, it is downright surreal that the custodian of the nation’s finances felt able to make such an obviously bonkers prediction to the Commons and the electorate. On Sunday, the Chancellor had to admit that he had been talking nonsense.

Lions led by Labour donkeys

The Labour government has been spinning aggressively that British troops are withdrawing from Iraq because the job is done. Major General Andy Salmon, the British Commander, has even made the rather dubious claim that Basra is now safer than Manchester. It is true that the progress made in recent months has been remarkable: there have only been three successful militia bomb attacks during this period. The recent provincial elections saw the extremist Fadhila party, which had controlled the city, well and truly routed. Prime Minister Maliki’s Dawa party won a plurality of the votes and a majority of the seats; a testament to the public’s view of the Charge of the Knights which Maliki launched in March 2008 to drive the militias out of Basra.

Gordon’s April Fool

We at The Spectator would like to say sorry to the Prime Minister. When he declared in October that the world needed a ‘new Bretton Woods’ — a reference to the 1944 conference that established the global financial system — we took him at his word. And when he swore that the G20 summit in London would be a great event, and that world leaders would do ‘whatever it takes’, we assumed he meant what he said. We now realise that we severely underestimated the PM’s sense of humour and failed to see the twinkling eye of surrealist humour in those dour features. In fact, the G20 has been the grandest April Fool in living memory, a spectacular raspberry to the planet by the men and women who are meant to be co-ordinating the recovery of the global economy.

Same old rules

A series of selective leaks had suggested that the second edition of the country’s counter-terrorism strategy, released on Tuesday, would see a shift from trying to tackle violent extremism to tackling extremism per se. This would have been a welcome development. Counter-terrorism in Britain has been crippled by a strategic failure to match policy to the reality that terrorism is merely the symptom of a wider problem: namely the hold of extremist Islamism on a small but significant slice of the British population. However, as so often, the spin was misleading. The document is actually deeply cautious — a reflection of the splits in government over this issue.

Nineteen Eighty-Four? Yes, please

Jade Goody was propelled to a very strange form of modern stardom by the reality TV show Big Brother, and even learned of the cancer that finally claimed her life last weekend on the Indian version of that programme. The title of the show was Orwellian. But what the author of Nineteen Eighty-Four could never have predicted is that the citizens would subject themselves to the scrutiny of the cameras voluntarily. The deeper threat to human dignity in 2009 is not state surveillance but pathological exhibitionism. In so many respects, what Orwell foretold has come to pass — with the crucial difference that it has been embraced by consumers not imposed upon them by the totalitarian state.

The cost of learning

A momentous shift occurred in British politics this week: the National Union of Students accepted the principle that graduates should contribute to the cost of their degrees. This U-turn is proof that the argument that graduates should pay for their tuition has at last been won, 11 years after the introduction of fees in 1998. The system that existed before then, though routinely described as a badge on civilisation, was, in practice, deeply immoral. University education was paid for out of general taxation: the poorest in society were subsidising the education of those who would go on to be the richest.

Marx!

At The Spectator, we are anti-Marxist but pro-musical. So it is with mixed feelings that we learned that Chinese producers in Beijing are to turn Das Kapital into a stage show, complete with big dance numbers and catchy songs. The director, He Nian, told Wen Hui Bao newspaper that ‘the particular performance style we choose is not important, but Marxist theories cannot be distorted’. We disagree. Marx’s theories are wholly discredited, but the style in which musicals are performed is a matter of global importance. Imagine, then, the scene as the two founders of communism perform the duet that will lead to the Russian Revolution and the Cold War. Friedrich Engels returns from hunting and finds his friend reading yet another volume of Hegel by candlelight.

They haven’t gone away

For Sinn Fein, the terrorist atrocity on Saturday night that left two British soldiers dead came at the worst possible time and involved the worst possible category of victim. Up until 2007, it seemed possible that the party would soon be in government on both sides of the border. This would have allowed it to claim that its goal of a united Ireland was within reach. But Sinn Fein failed in the 2007 Irish election; voters south of the border were repelled by the gangsterism of the Northern Bank robbery in 2004, in which £26.5 million was seized. In the North, the Democratic Unionist Party has out-manoeuvred Sinn Fein on issues from the Irish language act, to policing, to education reform.

Heir of the dog

If Prince Charles is guilty of anything in selling the ‘Duchy Herbals Detox Tincture’, now the subject of a hysterical scientific controversy, it is the sin of euphemism. The food supplement is marketed as a way to ‘eliminate toxins and aid digestion’. What this means, in the Queen’s English, is that it aspires to be a hangover cure. According to the perfectly named Edzard Ernst, professor of complementary medicine at Exeter University, the Prince is relying on ‘make-believe and superstition’, is peddling ‘outright quackery’ and even ‘contributes to the ill-health of the nation by pretending we can all over-indulge and then take this tincture and be fine again’. Professor Ernst needs to get out more.

Not up to the job

‘Nobody rings a bell at the bottom of the market,’ says an old adage in the investment world — and anyone who thought they had already heard a distant peal signalling the low point of the current financial crisis has been proved woefully mistaken this week. Some stock-market investors, for example, had begun to feel that blue-chip equities looked attractively cheap in relation to historic dividend yields. But now, one after another, and on both sides of the Atlantic, major companies are slashing dividends or abandoning them altogether: in some cases as a matter of urgent necessity, in others as a matter of opportunism at a time when yields on alternatives such as cash deposits and government bonds are at rock bottom.

Post haste

The sight of massed ranks of public sector workers and Labour backbenchers furiously protesting against a threat of privatisation surely belongs to a past era. Today’s major political trend is in quite the opposite direction, towards nationalisation of banks, and interventions by government in industry to save jobs and avert financial catastrophe. It seems jarringly out of tune with the times for a cabinet minister to be calling for the Royal Mail, a public sector institution woven into the very fabric of national life, to be exposed to the vicissitudes of the market and the profit motives of private investors — possibly foreigners, to boot.