Dear Mary: how can I prevent my daughter from getting ‘tweakments’?

Q. My husband has been appointed to a post in Wales and we as a family have moved here for the foreseeable future. My daughter, who is 15, is very happy at her day school but there is a pervasive culture of ‘tweakments’ there and I am worried the pressure to begin having Botox, fillers etc will be too strong for her to resist when it kicks in. We cannot afford to send her away to school. Help! How we can prevent her from ruining her lovely young looks?

– S.C., Cardiff

A. Simply buy a copy of your local newspaper and put a Post-It note onto every page featuring a story about a local woman. You can then draw to your husband’s attention (with your daughter in the room) the fact that every single one of these local women looks identical, i.e. all with long eyelashes, dyed blonde hair and swollen lips. ‘How extraordinary, they all look identical!’ you can marvel unjudgmentally. This will have a good impact on your daughter.

Q. I come into contact with a lot of young people and I cannot stand the way they always say ‘100 per cent’ instead of yes. How can I put a stop to this?

– L.G., Fosbury, Wilts

A. Don’t even try. It is something of a compliment that you hear these words so often – ‘100 per cent’ in junior-speak translates to a definite yes. So much of life for the under-thirties is so provisional because of phone use that they simply cannot use the word yes, as it is not a concept in their lives. You should be thankful they have not yet latched on to saying ‘100 and 10 per cent’.

Q. My husband and I did not intend to get married in our late teens but we did and have been actually rather happy ever since. All through the 40 years of our marriage we have had the same cleaner, who has always been there for us and helped to bring up our four children, as well as keeping the house reasonably civilised. Our problem is that this beloved cleaner is now 78 and will not stop coming to work. It’s not that we can’t afford her – we can, just, but we do not need her here six hours a day when our children have left home. We have offered her a pension and urged her to retire but she has refused. How can we kindly tell her to stop coming without her feeling unvalued?

– V.H., Hereford

A. Don’t try. Instead repay this once indispensable person’s loyalty to you by letting her still come. She may find your house more congenial than her own and moreover is probably fond of you. Give up the pretence that she is there to work and learn to enjoy her company and just having her there doing the occasional useful thing.