Philip Patrick

It had all started so well for Naomi Osaka. Dressed in the colours of the Japanese flag, the tennis star was given the signal honour of lighting the cauldron in Friday’s opening ceremony at the Tokyo Olympics. She was presented as a symbol not only of Japan, but also of the Olympic movement’s self-proclaimed diverse and progressive philosophy. Yet her hopes of glory were extinguished just four days later after an error-strewn performance against world number 42 Markéta Vondroušová. Her underwhelming Olympic adventure prompted words of sympathy from many.

Such gloom and negativity has surrounded the Tokyo Olympics that cynics were suggesting that, when the grand Olympic countdown clock outside Tokyo station finally reached zero at 8pm on Friday, it should be reset – for August 8th. That way we could all ‘count down’ the days until the whole damn thing was over. And then really celebrate. But there are a few signs that the pessimistic mood may be shifting, albeit slightly. One indication was the thousands who gathered outside the Olympic stadium on Friday, as the opening ceremony took place inside. To the evident surprise of the battalions of police, who had cordoned off the arena and were clearly expecting serious trouble, only a very small number, were anti games protesters (I saw about fifty).

Tokyo The late A.A. Gill, in his notorious ‘Mad in Japan’ essay, concluded that the only way you could make sense of Tokyo was to think of it as a vast open-air lunatic asylum, with inmates instead of residents. Gill would have loved Arisa. I don’t think I’ve ever encountered anything more stereotypically Japanese than Arisa. She’s a multilingual robot concierge at Nishi-Shinjuku station in central Tokyo, one of the thousands of new automatons installed in the city ahead of the Olympics next month. She has a rather creepy Doctor Who look to her — she could be Davros’s girlfriend — and she’s there to assist tourists.

Japan has just raised its target for reducing carbon emissions from 26 per cent to 46 per cent (by 2030 from 2013 levels). But how was this figure arrived at, environment minister Shinjiro Koizumi was asked? Through a careful analysis of the threat and a realistic assessment of what could be achieved, taking all relevant factors into consideration? Well, er no, according to Koizumi, the number 46 just appeared to him in ‘silhouette’ in a sort of vision. Shinjiro Koizumi, son of former prime minister Junichiro Koizumi, made the comments in an interview with the TV station TBS last weekend. The interviewer, despite her face mask, was clearly stunned by the revelation that the country’s emission target did not appear to have any scientific basis.

Things are going from bad to worse for Tokyo's cursed Olympics. Just a month after Yoshiro Mori, the former PM, and ex-head of the Tokyo Olympic organising committee was forced to quit for suggesting female members should have their speaking time rationed, along comes another storm in a green tea cup, and yet another resignation.  The latest fiasco concerns comments made by Hiroshi Sasaki, the now former creative director of the opening and closing ceremonies about the actress, comedian and fashion designer Naomi Watanabe. Watanabe, a ubiquitous presence on the inane and exhaustingly upbeat variety shows that dominate TV here, is known as the ‘Japanese Beyoncé’ for the impressions of the American singer, which brought her to prominence.

Tokyo This week was the tenth anniversary of the Great East Japan Earthquake, the most powerful earthquake ever recorded in the country. It, along with the tsunami it triggered, claimed an estimated 19,000 lives. I was walking in the Shibuya district of Tokyo when the quake knocked me off my feet. I recall being first puzzled (why am I falling?); then awestruck, as I glanced up at a thin concrete ‘pencil’ building swaying gently like a flower in the breeze. Two women on a balcony seemed to be, bizarrely, unaccountably, laughing. Then I became aware of a man running towards me, gesticulating frantically and, oddly for Japan, swearing. When the tremors passed, I picked myself up and noticed his hard hat, overalls and expression of wonder mingled with relief.

Japan finally began its Covid-19 vaccination programme this week after a consignment of 60,000 vials arrived by charter flight from Europe. Medical staff will be first in line to be jabbed, followed by Japan’s innumerable seniors (presumably starting with the super-centenarians), then those with pre-existing conditions, and finally the general population. A rapid and successful roll out is seen as a last chance to save the summer Olympics and with it, probably, the government of Prime Minister Yoshihide Suga. But a whole host of problems is making that outcome look decidedly optimistic.

‘Analytical intelligence, absolutely. Emotional intelligence, zero’. That was Tony Blair’s withering assessment of his successor Gordon Brown. It is a description which could as easily be applied to Japan’s beleaguered prime minister Yoshihide Suga. The former chief cabinet secretary, long-time right-hand man and ‘brain’ of long serving PM Shinzo Abe is showing alarming Brownite tendencies in his handling of the media and political relationships. Amid plummeting poll ratings the rumour is that he’ll be lucky to make it to his first anniversary in power. Like Gordon Brown, Suga took over as PM from a three-time election winner.