Fraser Nelson

Gordon Brown frequently asserts Britain has record employment or that Labour has “the best employment record in history” (Hansard, 16 Jan 08). In fact this honour goes to Nigel Lawson whose achievements Brown has never been able to come close to. Brown has specialised in finding alternatives to work – welfare, studenthood, etc. But here is the graph for economic activity percentage rates – ie, the proportion of people in work. It’s a strange graph because, aside from the industrial realignment of early Thatcher years, it basically oscillates between 78% and 80%. Sadly, this is not adjusted for immigration – which accounts for 82% of new jobs since 1997 according to the Statistics Commission (pdf). So how can Brown claim that he has record employment?

I know one shouldn't take Liberal Democrat policy seriously, but I went along to their first lobby briefing today just to see. Anyone who believes Gordon Brown is detached from reality should have taken a seat as Nick Clegg and Norman Baker faced lobby journalists. It was on their transport policy, to reverse Beeching cuts with a new generation of railways as seen in, em, no other country in the world. What cost? They haven't worked that out yet. But the money would come, Baker explained, from train companies in return for even longer franchises. One problem though: train operating companies don't have money of their own other than what the taxpayer gives them - apart from Gatwick Express and a couple of others all rail franchises run at a substantial loss.

Not so long ago, James Purnell released a speech on Microsoft Word format. This excites Tory researchers, who inevitably get hold of it, as they can interrogate the document - look for any revisions and, of course, the author. The "author" of the Purnell speech was one Phil Collins, who used to do work for Tony Blair. The smarter Tories (and I include Purnell's shadow, Chris Grayling, amongst them) would have realised this is bad news. Collins is one of the more clued-up Labour people, who gets what Brown doesn't and can find a vocabulary to reach out to the people now deserting Labour in droves. So news that Collins has been sent packing, due to a disobliging (but entirely accurate) piece he wrote about Labour's current state of affairs, is truly news to cheer the Tories.

Helmand Province, Afghanistan I have adopted the Gordon Brown strategy and disappeared after a bad by-election result for Labour. My excuse is that I’m now in Afghanistan, finding out how things are in Helmand. Afghanistan is an amazing country whose people combine abject poverty with the ability to endure weather of -20c in winter to 50c in summer. Such hardiness makes for resolute fighters, but it seems the Taliban have failed to recruit for this season. The poppy harvest ended three weeks ago, and the fighting usually starts immediately as the hired $10 Taliban” swap ploughshares for Kalashnikovs. Not this time, though. As one solider told me “the problem with the $10 Taliban is they receive $0 training and get killed.” It seems they have given up.

Basra, Iraq Two years ago when Des Browne came here they wouldn’t let him out of the car. Now, he can do a walkabout in downtown Basra. The liberation on March 25th, when the Iraqi army’s Charge of the Knights liberated the city from the Shi’ite militias, has transformed the situation here. When Prime Minister Maliki announced the Charge of the Knights, Muqtada al-Sadr mocked it as the charge of the mice. But is has turned into the biggest surprise successes of the war. Maliki is making his army’s presence felt in Basra--there are check-points with the Iraqi flag on them all over the city—and he has gone from zero to hero here. British troops are back on the streets again.

I took part in an LBC radio debate this morning about Gordon Brown’s YouTube initiative with Nick Ferrari, radio’s equivalent to a morning Bloody Mary. A LBC reporter has sent in her own question via video phone - was Blair right to think you have no chance against David Cameron? It won’t get past the censors, of course – party political content. So far 20 videos have, and I surveyed them this morning. Some literally start with Young People thanking the Dear Leader for “this brilliant opportunity” to question him on YouTube with all the authenticity of a backbencher reading a planted question at PMQs. None were about tax or immigration, the two top subjects in Britain today – but almost all were from under-35s, so perhaps this explains it.

Like Matt, I was genuinely impressed by the defrosted Gordon Brown on display at the Google conference. However - and churlish though it may be - I’d like to point out that his Einstein joke (where he swaps places with his chauffeur) is a Brownie. The genesis of this fake and oft-repeated tale is here. You may think the PM’s claim to have seen a banner saying “worldwide campaign against globalisation” is real because he used it in Jan08, Jul07, Mar07, Jan07 and Nov06 and (first) in a Newsweek article in Sep06. My guess is that he spotted this slogan not in a demo, but in an Apr00 article by William Keegan here. But it’s a good gag, and I applaud the sentiment.