Lemon squeezy
Don Lemon, the former CNN anchor turned Substack influencer, was taken into custody by Homeland Security and FBI agents in Los Angeles last night. Lemon had previously covered an anti-ICE protest that disrupted a church service in St. Paul, Minnesota, earlier this month – though a federal judge in the state refused to approve charges against him. Another independent video journalist present at the church service, Georgia Fort, has also been arrested by federal agents, who said they were acting upon a grand-jury decision. Lemon faces two charges: conspiracy to deprive rights and FACE Act violation. For context: a number of independent and video journalists were charged following the January 6 riot at the Capitol. Some found themselves subsequently pardoned by President Trump.
Arresting Lemon, naturally, serves to elevate his profile and valorize him. The outcry this morning has been predictable: “This is outrageous and cannot stand,” wrote fellow Substacker Jim Acosta. “The First Amendment is under attack in America!” Their former employer CNN said the arrest raises “profoundly concerning questions.”
“Don Lemon is an accomplished journalist whose urgent work is protected by the First Amendment,” wrote House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. “There is zero basis to arrest him and he should be freed immediately.”
A more startling response came courtesy of fellow influencer Katie Miller, wife of Stephen. Within minutes of the announcement of Lemon’s arrest, the 34-year-old tweeted a clip of her forthcoming podcast episode with newly MAGA rapper Nicki Minaj. “You called for Don Lemon’s arrest over his church stunt in Minneapolis. He’s since called you racist, unhinged, homophobic and out of your depth. Anything you’d like to say to Don Lemon?” Miller asks, as Minaj laughs. “Cocksucker, stop,” Minaj says, looking dead into the camera. Miller cackles in response.
So much for that long-promised end to lawfare…
On our radar
KEVIN?!?!? President Trump nominated Kevin Warsh as the new Federal Reserve chair. “On top of everything else, he is ‘central casting,’ and he will never let you down,” the President said in a statement this morning.
NOTHING TO SEE HERE Ghislaine Maxwell claimed that 29 of Jeffrey Epstein’s friends were shielded by the Department of Justice through “secret settlements” in a habeas corpus petition last month.
WE ARE CHARLIE COIN? Turning Point USA spokesman Andrew Kolvet had his X account hacked by crypto-scammers last night. The hackers used his account to promote “$CHARLIE.”
Ivanka’s island-hopping
It’s win some, lose some for the Trump family real-estate business – no sooner did the high-profile Greenland deal fall through than Ivanka Trump nabbed another piece of prime property. Mrs. Trump has acquired the uninhabited island of Sazan, just off the coast of Albania, for $1.4 billion, which she plans to develop into a luxury resort.
The deal, brokered by her husband Jared Kushner’s vehicle Atlantic Incubation Partners, was concluded with Albania’s strategic-investment committee in December 2024, shortly after Trump Sr. won his bid for reelection.
The deal has been criticized by more than 40 environmental groups, who argue that Sazan should be preserved as one of the last unspoiled islands in the Mediterranean.
In a Trumpian flourish, Ivanka told Lex Fridman during an appearance on his podcast that “we’re bringing in the best architects and the best brands… It’s going to be extraordinary.”
The locals have apparently taken to calling Sazan “Trump island.” Cockburn can’t help but notice the similarities between Sazan and Elbe, where the powers of Europe once tried to confine Napoleon. Perhaps the island will one day serve as the retirement home of our own era’s Bonaparte.
Kristi Noem’s flights of fancy
The Department of Homeland Security is trying a gentler tack, as its tactics of breaking down doors, smashing car windows and generally terrorizing the populace with anonymous masked antagonists hasn’t won it favor in the court of public opinion.
“HOMESICK?” the DHS X account posted Thursday. For a limited time, if you’re an illegal immigrant and you use the Border Patrol Home app, the US government will give you $2,600 and a FREE flight home. “Leave now,” DHS tweeted. “Avoid the discomfort of not knowing WHEN we’re going to arrest you.” DHS falls short of offering a food voucher or Capital One Rewards points.
DHS accompanied this tweet with a video of various world-tourism spots, accompanied by a kind of Muzak version of Motley Crüe’s “I’m On My Way.” Cockburn highly doubts anyone who’s here illegally is headed straight for the Eiffel Tower, or Giza, or Angel Falls, but sure. The young man who’s using the app in the video looks happy. The deal certainly sounds better than a sharp stick in the eye. Or getting shot ten times in the head at point-blank range. Baby steps.
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