Tim Bales

‘When it comes to Trump, we have thousands of words for no!’

‘With the world in flux, at least we’ve our Cuba holiday to look forward to.’

‘Fantastic news, sir – another prisoner has been released by mistake!’

I’d far rather be in Rio, on Copacabana Beach!’

‘These homemade biscuits – are they meant to be trick or treat?’

‘It’s an invoice from my parents and they’re charging more than the nursery.’

‘Oh no, not more flag-waving!’

‘They are fast becoming something akin to a crusade.’

‘That also rather sums up Labour’s immigration policy.’

‘It’s the only reduction our water company has ever offered us.’

‘It’ll be so big, it’ll be a country within a country – namely ours.’

‘With all the solar and wind farms, there are no scenic routes left.’

‘That’s what I have every time it’s your round.’

‘Their worst punishment would be having to share a cell.’

‘While Reform were making history, the Tories were becoming it.’