Steerpike

Look out for Mr Steerpike in this week's Spectator magazine, but here's a taster of what's coming up: 'Lynton Crosby's swear-box is filling up. The Aussie strategist may have guided Boris to victory in this year's mayoral contest, but he managed to alienate many of BoJo's inner circle in the process. One former Boris aide leaked a rumour that Crosby had made disparaging asides about 'f***ing Muslim voters' in London. Instant retaliation followed when a Crosby crony let slip that the Australian guru regarded all Boris's aides as 'f***wits.' These dark whispers are extremely unwelcome to Crosby. He hates 'process stories' which shift attention away from clear political messages and onto managerial snarl-ups.

‘Passive Aggressiveness – a personality trait or disorder marked by a pervasive pattern of negative attitudes and passive, usually disavowed, resistance in interpersonal or occupational situations.’ Theory aside, Lord Ashcroft’s letter to the Tory’s returning adviser Lynton Crosby, published by his site ConservativeHome this morning, is a near perfect example. It’s dressed up as friendly advice, of course: ‘Finally, I know you understand as much as anyone that it’s never a good thing when the adviser is the story. That being the case, I’m sure you’ll get on with the job and stay out of the limelight. Meanwhile, I’ll be following progress closely and will no doubt have more to say as things unfold.

One of Britain’s leading pollsters has written to the Prime Minister to rebuke him for misleading his supporters over whether the Conservative Party would suffer in the polls if they legislated on gay marriage. The Spectator has seen an incredible exchange of letters between the Prime Minister, the former Welsh Secretary, Cheryl Gillan, and Andrew Hawkins, the CEO of the polling company ComRes. Since being sacked in September, Gillan has become one of the Prime Minister’s more vocal critics and recently slammed the government's gay marriage proposals. Responding to Gillan in a letter that was then leaked to the Pink News, David Cameron relied heavily on polling data from ComRes to claim that legalising gay marriage would make more people vote Conservative.

The Prime Minister chose his words carefully earlier today when asked if he would be sending his children to private school. Sky News’ eagle-eyed Sophy Ridge reports that Cameron was cross-examined by a pesky school kid at a ‘Cameron Direct’ meeting this morning at the John Cabot Academy in Bristol. Cameron told his inquisitor that he ‘would like’ his children ‘to go to state school’, which is nearly the same thing as saying that they will do. The Prime Minister pointed out that his two children of school age - Nancy, 8, and Arthur, 6, attend state primary schools, which implies that they will continue to do so at secondary level. Only he didn’t quite say that because what he actually said was: ‘That is my intention.

Team Cameron, as my colleague James Forysth points out, are rather pleased with Obama’s victory. Downing Street’s finest have been pushing the idea that Barack Obama’s victory speech echoed, word for word, Cameron’s constant refrain that ‘we are all in this together’ and that the 'inherited economic mess' is slowly being overcome. Dave the Statesman, don’t you know? Obama has his admirers on the Opposition benches, as we know. The Labour Party was out in force at the two biggest victory bashes in central London last night: CNN’s opulent shindig at One Mayfair and the tackier affair at the US Embassy.

Dame Helen Ghosh's words about women and David Cameron's government have put Downing Street backs up this afternoon. Dame Helen, whose Civil Service career spanned thirty-three years culminated in a troublesome spell as Permanent Secretary at the Home Office, told Cambridge students it was ‘difficult for women to get in’ when the Prime Minister favoured his male school chums. Lines such as ‘women don’t network. It is actually quite difficult for a woman to get in as part of an Old Etonian clique. They are far too busy doing other things’ have gone down particularly badly. However, I hear that Dame Helen was not totally adverse to a bit of networking.

I gather that self-important Labour MP Tom Watson has earned £10,812 in royalties for the book he recently co-authored on phone-hacking, Dial M For Murdoch. New parliamentary records show that Watson claims to have devoted 175 hours to the project. Despite shunning an advance from publisher Allen Lane, this means the MP has still made an average of £61 per hour for his work so far - a figure that will increase if the book continues to sell. There is no mention in the latest Register of MPs' financial interests, where Watson has made the disclosure, of this cash being donated to charity or good causes. Surely Watson is not seeking to profit personally from the phone hacking affair?

To the gardens alongside Parliament, where MPs and their mutts lined up this morning in a bid to win the coveted title of Westminster Dog of the Year. Miniature Dachshunds appear to be the dog du jour among Tory MPs, with three of them competing to be crowned top dog. However, their short legs put them at a disadvantage in the Doggy Dash, while the rain left them shivering miserably in the corner. At times Essex bitch Joni (the only dog there to have marched at last weekend’s TUC rally, with owner Jon Cruddas) and Lindsay Hoyle’s Gordon looked as if they might be about to treat onlookers to a repeat performance of last week’s cat fight in Downing Street -  it seems no one had told them they were on the same team (Labour, that is).