Mary Killen

Mary Killen

Dear Mary: how do I stop my husband stripping off in the sun?

From our UK edition

Q. I own a small boutique in north London selling secondhand clothes which are exclusively couture. An acquaintance is a frequent shopper but has a tendency to return items a few days after buying them with reasons like ‘My husband didn’t like the colour’ or ‘I think it’s too young for me.’ I have been

Dear Mary: how do I stop guests contaminating my butter?

From our UK edition

Q. I spent day two of the Lord’s Test Match last week in the Grandstand. Shortly after play began, the adjacent seats were occupied. He, largely silent, was innocuous. She, of unpleasingly shrill-toned voice, wittered on inanely at high volume, barely pausing for breath, until they left late on. Destined to sit next to someone

Dear Mary: How do I get my host to open the wine I brought?

From our UK edition

Q. I have a friend who is a serious gardener. I myself am reasonably keen but not in her league. Last year she gave me some rare plants. Unfortunately I didn’t plant them very carefully and they ended up dying. She lives some distance away and I felt quite safe pretending they had flourished. With

Dear Mary: should I ask guests to pay to charge their Tesla?

From our UK edition

Q. My wife’s daughter and son-in-law and their family live about 40 miles away. Whenever they come to stay, he asks if he can use an electric socket to charge his new Tesla. Although he thanks me profusely for making a socket available, he does not offer to pay for the electricity. Were he to

Dear Mary: What’s the best response to a patronising man?

From our UK edition

Q. I have some fairly new friends who very generously invited me to stay with them in Turkey. They told me who would be coming and I was slightly dreading meeting up again with one man I haven’t seen since we were much younger. He was always patronising and a bit misogynistic, and – as

Dear Mary: How do I find a girlfriend who loves grouse shooting?

From our UK edition

Q. We have been introduced to some fellow parents at our children’s school. They are not quite on our wavelength – very status conscious and money obsessed – but we want to stay on good terms because our children are friends. Like us, they have moved to the country from London and bought an old

Dear Mary: How do I stop people telling me about their holidays?

From our UK edition

Q. American clients emailed saying they were coming to Europe this spring and inviting us and another couple on a fantastic-sounding boat trip in the eastern Mediterranean which we rather shamelessly accepted. Last week I got a further email saying, as the holiday was approaching, it was time to sort out the financial side of

Dear Mary: Will sharing a bed ruin our friendship?

From our UK edition

Q. I am a 29-year-old gay man. About four months ago I met a man at least 30 years older than me. We have become very good friends with many shared interests. I am certain that my friend (let’s call him ‘Tom’) has enjoyed the friendship as much as I have. It has been entirely

Dear Mary: Can I use ChatGPT to write thank-you letters?

From our UK edition

Q. Since my wife and I went our separate ways I have had lots of social invitations. My ex always dealt with the thank-you letters and I am useless at getting around to writing them. Now a friend has introduced me to an app called ChatGPT which writes letters and even poems for you if

Dear Mary: How do I stop my masseuse making conversation?

From our UK edition

Q. I am considered to be a friendly and communicative person in everyday life. However I have a bad back and need to have the occasional hour-long massage to offset the tension of having to sit down at work all day. My assistant books me in for ‘full body relaxation massage’ at various spas and