Mary Killen

Q. I have just returned from a holiday where I was the guest of someone extremely rich. She was emphatic that everything would be covered and I must not even think of bringing a present. However, after one lunch in a restaurant, I felt driven to make a gesture and quietly asked the waiter for

Q. I’m very fond of a neighbour in our village and we see a lot of each other. She has told me she has got X, an acquaintance of mine, coming to stay and wants to bring her over for a drink before lunch on the Sunday. The trouble is X is a decorator and

Q. Do you agree with me that it is very bad manners to ask for a wifi code as soon as you walk into a lunch in someone else’s house? I have a centrally located, although cramped, flat in Soho and am very happy to cook for friends and friends of friends, but it is

Q. I used to work for a well-known decorator and have now branched out on my own. Some friends of my parents have asked me if I’d like to redecorate their reception rooms. They’re very nice people and I think they have partly given me the work to help me establish myself. I’m a few

Q. I must be the only person with this problem but I would really welcome a solution. I have a lovely neighbour in the flat below who happily has my dog to stay when I go away. She also holds a set of keys to my flat so she can check all is well. This

Q. My husband had my portrait painted for my 40th birthday and everyone says it is an amazing likeness. Now his business partner wants the same artist to capture his wife on canvas. We are anxious because, as my husband says, the wife is ‘no looker’ and the artist is not one to give a

Q. I did a one-year cookery course in London a couple of years ago and then set myself up in business. Someone I know, who did the course prior to me and is an established dinner-party caterer, has been passing on to me work she can’t do (if she already has a booking on that

Q. When people come to stay for house parties, my husband – who already works a 60-hour week – does a lot of the unseen chores. He’s in charge of fires, drinks, seating plans, arranging outings, and he pays for everything. We are in our sixties and I know it is traditional etiquette to write

Q. At my request, a friend arranged an invitation to lunch at an exclusive sporting club in a well-known resort. The friend did not accompany us, and on arrival my wife and I discovered our host to be a very senior member of the club and we were expected to join him at his own

Q. I am executor of a deceased bachelor whose will is clear that I should distribute his estate to his long-standing friends. There is no mention of what to do with family photos and heirlooms, which have little market value, but he hung on to them for sentimental reasons. I had thought to offer them

Q. I have been in the wine trade all my working life. This has its pros and cons – dining at friends’ houses, for example, they invariably try to catch me out by serving decanted wine which I have to try to identify. My problem is that I am 50 this year and we have

Q. I invited a rather wonderful, single (and fairly shy) man to supper. I had hoped to pair him with a single friend of mine and during the evening they got on extremely well. The problem is that, although I have received a thank-you postcard, he made no mention of my friend. We are both

Q. I have been invited (solo, not with my long-term partner) to a wedding next year. The format appears to be: ceremony, drinks reception, then the main wedding party is dining together before we all get back together for an evening celebration. In the hiatus, guests are encouraged to eat in one of the local

From Henry Blofeld Q. The other day I went to an all-male dinner party of about 20 people in a highly respectable club. I spent the first few minutes shaking hands with most of the other people there and was horrified to find that quite a number of them kept their left hands in their

Q. I am a great admirer of Dr Jordan Peterson so am naturally inclined to want to discuss his ideas with others. Last week, however, the man next to me at my niece’s wedding took umbrage when I mentioned Dr Peterson’s name and that I was a fan. This fellow guest turned out to be

Q. My father missed my mother so much after 50 years together that, following her death, he married again. I make every effort with my new stepmother but we have nothing in common. To be frank, common is the operative word. What I really mind is that when he and I meet alone for our

Q. I have given in to pressure from a talented godson and agreed to introduce him to a successful businessman whom my godson thinks he could work with. Knowing them both well, I believe he is right. I have arranged a dinner party at my house but we are going to be four men and

Q. I have noticed in various publications celebrating the King’s 75th birthday that he has been formally photographed with his tie tucked into his trouser belt. I am not sure about this look. Perhaps you might be kind enough to advise? After all, if His Majesty does adopt this, perhaps we few remaining tie wearers should

Q. Wealthy ex-pat friends came to stay and, despite being attended to assiduously by our major domo, they left without leaving him a tip. I concealed their faux pas by palming him €50 and pretending that they had given it to me to give to him. But I am annoyed at their lack of consideration,