Cockburn

There are plenty of legitimate reasons to shave a few years off your age. Sportsmen do it all the time for example. Cockburn did it in a bar last week.  But if you’re in the public eye, are known for not being particularly popular and are estranged from your fame-hungry family, it’s possible that you'd raise suspicions if doing so. Meghan Markle has recently been accused of lying about her age as she celebrated her forty-second birthday on August 4.  The conspiracy arose on the internet, as all the best ones do. A YouTube video viewed tens of thousands of times claims that the duchess is actually several years older. "The court papers filed by her sister state Meghan was born in 1977," the narrator says.

First Lady Dr. Jill Biden has graced the cover of another magazine, this time Women's Health, a health and fitness periodical for female-identifiers. Brace yourself for the interview that accompanies the beach photoshoot; Liz Plosser, the mag's editor-in-chief, has a difficult time disguising her puppy-dog crush on the community college English teacher. Given the fact that Mrs. Biden is a doctor, Cockburn was hopeful that she would share some of her health-related expertise. Alas, thanks to Plosser's mighty gentle probing, we only found out a few odds and ends regarding Biden's exercise routine and love of fish and vegetables.

Prince Harry’s recent run of bad luck is continuing, after it was ruled Thursday that his phone-hacking claims against a UK publisher have been thrown out by a High Court judge.  The judge also dismissed Harry's conspiratorial claim that there was a “secret agreement” between Buckingham Palace and the British press, calling the arrangement Harry described “implausible.” In his ruling, the judge said that the prince’s case had “not reached the necessary threshold of plausibility and cogency.” Harry’s lawsuit accusing the publisher of the Sun tabloid of unlawfully snooping on him, can go to trial.