Mattel

If you saw the Barbie movie this week, chances are you enjoyed Michael Cera's performance as the long forgotten Allan doll. Cockburn must admit he doesn’t have much experience with kids’ toys (thanks to his lawyers, who fight paternity suits like pitbulls), but even he’s surprised at how lucrative a market the doll market is becoming. After its opening weekend, where Barbie raked in an estimated $155 million, now anyone with an Allan doll can make their own small fortune by selling it. Over the weekend, several eBay listings for old Allan dolls increased their prices. Before the film came out, some were priced as low as $30; now, the valuation has increased to over $300.  Since the movie's release, Allan has turned into a fan favorite.

I was going to write about Monument Valley, and I suppose I will eventually, but first I have to write about this total catastrophe that has overwhelmed my life. Online Scrabble has gone! This was the proper Mattel trademark version that I’ve been playing for years with friends and it has suddenly been replaced by some hideous all-singing all-dancing version called Scrabble GO which looks like Candy Crush and — worse — is infested with ads. Not quick flash ads either but interminable videos about, say, a new type of squeegee. Everyone tells me I will get used to it eventually but I’m not sure I want to. Did you ever, as a child, lose your favourite old sucking blanket when some hygiene Nazi put it in the washing machine and it came out in shreds?