Len

‘I’m dreading Christmas. Now that lockdown’s relaxed I’ll have to see the bloody grandkids.’

‘It’s his coping strategy.’

‘I can hear purring. Let’s just hope it’s not the snake feeling contented.’

‘He’ll be furious when he comes round — he’s very much against wearing a mask.’

‘I wish you’d stop moaning — I planted another tree, didn’t I?’

‘Lockdown hasn’t been all bad — it’s made me focus on what I really want out of life.’

‘You never said anything about it being a formal affair.’

‘And the prince and princess lived happily ever after? I know it’s a fairy tale, but that’s just pushing it too far.’

‘On the other hand, it’s a marvellous example of successful rewilding.’

‘You twisted psycho! You’re going to starve me to death.’

‘I said just look as if you are pushing it over.’

‘His mood improved when he found out how much the economic crisis will disproportionately affect the young.’

‘Gotta dash — there’s a Zoom meeting at 2 p.m. that I need to interrupt.’

‘I think they’re called “bags for life” because they stay with us for ever.’

‘Children! No phones on the table!’