Cockburn, Author at The Spectator

Tuesday

May 30, 2023

Cockburn

Babylon Bee fires conservative activist for swearing at DeSantis press sec on Twitter

It was a not-so-happy start to the Memorial Day weekend for conservative activist Gavin Wax. Wax was publicly fired from his job at the Babylon Bee, a Christian right-wing satire site, on Friday over a not-so-nice tweet about a member of the DeSantis 2024 campaign. Wax, who runs the New York Young Republicans and supports former president Donald Trump in the GOP primary, was warring against DeSantis supporters last week who implicitly accused him of fraud because he used to work for Gettr. Gettr was financially backed by Miles Guo, a Chinese businessman who was arrested for allegedly orchestrating a $1 billion fraud conspiracy. Cockburn acknowledges that this is all very confusing. Stick with him.

Cockburn

Democrats gag congresswomen in kinky new billboards

Democrats are rolling out a novel strategy heading into 2024: kinky ads featuring Republicans. Cockburn, whose stance is pro-kink and anti-shame, came across new billboards that House Democrats are launching against Congresswomen Jen Kiggans and Michelle Steel. The two trailblazing women are depicted gagged, next to a bare-faced Donald Trump. The ads argue that the women were silent when former President Trump said he wanted to defund federal law enforcement. Kiggans won her seat in 2022, two years after Trump left the White House, while Steel won hers in 2020, so overlapped with him for all of two weeks. The ads suggest that the main strategy Democrats have to retake the House is rehashing the anti-Trump messaging that was effective... when Trump was actually president.

Friday

May 26, 2023

Cockburn

New WSJ chief stunned by so-called American ‘work ethic’

Emma Tucker has had her work cut out for her since she was moved from London to New York, and from the editorship of the Sunday Times to the helm of the Wall Street Journal. The step up to the pride of Murdoch’s newspaper stable from its plucky British cousin was enough of a challenge. Then Evan Gershkovich was arrested by Vladimir Putin’s goons, putting the paper’s leadership into full-blown crisis-management mode. Cockburn understands that the flat-out Tucker has been underwhelmed by the work ethic of her new American colleagues. “What do they all do all day?” she is reportedly prone to wondering out loud.

Wednesday

May 24, 2023

Cockburn

Poet laureate can’t define a ‘ban’

Amanda Gorman, the young female poet who read at Joe Biden's inauguration lamented on Tuesday night that her poem had been banned by a Florida school library. “Just found out my inaugural poem 'The Hill We Climb' has been banned from an elementary school in Miami-Dade County because it causes "confusion and indoctrination,” America's first National Youth Poet Laureate tweeted. The poem, however, was never banned. Instead, according to the Miami-Dade school district, “The Hill We Climb” was moved from the elementary section of the library to the middle-school section. “It was determined at the school that ‘The Hill We Climb’ is better suited for middle-school students and, it was shelved in the middle-school section of the media center.

Monday

May 22, 2023

Cockburn

Bud Light remains for sale in virtually every Trump Organization business

As the Bud Light War enters what feels like its fifth year, Cockburn has further evidence that America’s "wokest" brew has an unlikely ally, giving it beachheads at some of the world's swankiest properties. The Trump Organization, which boasts properties in several continents, offers Bud Light and/or Bud Heavy at its properties in locations ranging from Chicago to Los Angeles to Scotland. A Cockburn review on Trump Organization menus show that the beer goes from £6.50 in Scotland, to $7 at his iconic Trump Tower in New York City, to $9 in Chicago, to $10 in Vegas. Trump’s Bud Light offerings go beyond just his hotels. Want some suds while you’re golfing? Trump National Golf Club in Los Angeles, for example, has you covered at only $7 a beer, or a six-pack for $35.

Friday

May 19, 2023

Cockburn

Jeff Roe and his campaign cash grab

GOP campaign consultant Jeff Roe is the subject of new reporting in the Washington Post that shows his company, Axiom Strategies, takes in 63 percent of every dollar spent by the campaigns it is managing. A general consultant typically only takes in less than 10 percent. So what is Jeff Roe doing with all of that extra cash? According to a recent photo being passed around among journalists, campaign consultants, and even among members of Congress, Roe is icing up. The consultant was spotted at the Kentucky Derby wearing a blinged-out dollar sign chain. A tipster sent the picture Cockburn's way: Cockburn’s sources say Roe was telling people at the horse race that it was real, but now is downplaying it as a joke.

Cockburn

Joe Manchin’s next move: West Virginia University?

Senator Joe Manchin is eyeing the presidency... of West Virginia University, multiple Mountain State sources tell Cockburn. While Manchin hasn’t publicly expressed interest in the job, the stars may be aligning perfectly for him. Charleston political circles have been abuzz with the rumors of his interest for weeks now. Seventy-five-year-old Manchin will be weighing all options that don’t entail a near-certain defeat at the ballot box in West Virginia next year, meaning a near-certain defeat at the national ballot box with a quixotic third party presidential campaign is unlikely. The presidency of WVU, which Manchin attended on a football scholarship before an injury derailed his career, makes a lot of sense for both parties.

Thursday

May 18, 2023

Cockburn

A slobbering WIRED interview with Mayor Pete, DC’s most ‘voluminous mind’

Transportation secretary Pete Buttigieg may just be the smartest man in DC, likely even a card-carrying Mensa member, according to a fawning WIRED interview published Thursday. Virginia Heffernan, a contributor to the magazine, came to this dazzling conclusion when she sat down to speak with Mayor Pete “in his undernourished corner office one afternoon in early spring.” “I slowly became aware that his cabinet job requires only a modest portion of his cognitive powers,” she recalled. Cockburn, however, thinks the people of East Palestine would like it to take up slightly more mental headspace. Heffernan is right, however. Buttigieg does hold much of his mind’s “functionality in reserves.

Wednesday

May 17, 2023

Cockburn

Where’s the beef? Eric Adams wants to force New Yorkers to be vegetarian like him

New York City mayor Eric Adams is on a quest to cut the city’s “food-related emissions” by 33 percent by 2030, and not by making Gas-X free to residents. Adams, whom the New York Times reports is “a self-described vegan who sometimes eats fish,” has expressed support for the city reducing the amount of meat it serves at schools, hospitals and in other government-funded capacities. “It is easy to talk about emissions that are coming from vehicles and how it impacts our carbon footprint,” Adams said. “It is easy to talk about the emissions that’s coming from buildings and how it impacts our environment. But we now have to talk about beef. And I don’t know if people are really ready for this conversation.

Cockburn

Harry and Meghan claim near-fatal ‘car chase’ through traffic-heavy NYC streets

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle were followed by paparazzi in a "near catastrophic" car chase Tuesday night in New York City, according to a statement from the couple's spokesperson. "Last night, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex and Ms. Ragland [Markle's mother] were involved in a near catastrophic car chase at the hands of a ring of highly aggressive paparazzi," the spokesperson said. "The relentless pursuit, lasting over two hours, resulted in multiple near collisions involving other drivers on the road, pedestrians and two NYPD officers." https://twitter.com/chrisshipitv/status/1658844017918869510 The incident supposedly occurred as Harry and Meghan were leaving the Ms. Foundation for Women gala at the Ziegfeld Ballroom in Midtown.

Tuesday

May 16, 2023

Cockburn

Is Taylor Swift the problem?

Pop superstar Taylor Swift is in the middle of a PR crisis as her fans overwhelmingly disapprove of her new beau, Matty Healy, the lead singer of English rock band the 1975. Healy has been attending Swift's concerts and the pair have been spotted several times kissing and holding hands in public. Taylor Swift and Matty Healy seen leaving the Electric Lady studio in Manhattan on May 16, 2023 in New York City (Robert Kamau/GC Images) Cockburn's niece tells him that Swift's online fan forums are blowing up with debate over the Midnights singer's decision to date the irreverent rock star.

Cockburn

The Lincoln Project tries to Bud Light Dr. Pepper

The Lincoln Project, a disgraced PAC launched in 2019 “to defeat Donald Trump at the ballot box” and “to ensure Trumpism failed alongside him,” has a new mission: take down Dr. Pepper for advertising on Fox News. Having seemingly taken inspiration from the Bud Light/Dylan Mulvaney boycott that’s seen conservatives abandon the beloved beer brand in droves, the Lincoln Project called out “Texas’s favorite soft drink” on Twitter, scolding: “Your motto is ‘Drink Well. Do Good.’ Your goal is to ‘make a positive impact with every drink.’ Yet you continue to advertise on Fox News, a network committed to telling lies and degrading our public discourse. Time to live up to your promise and drop Fox.

Monday

May 15, 2023

Cockburn

The election episode put the ‘suck’ in Succession

Like everyone else in the Acela corridor, Cockburn has been avidly watching the final season of Succession. Without giving too much away, there have been some moments this season that are up there with the best of prestige television: the real-time playing out of a medical emergency in the third episode, for example. Cockburn feels entitled, then, to speak up when the show is less than great — and Sunday night's election special was an absolute stinker. One of the best things about Succession is that it feels like it takes place in a realistic parallel universe, very similar to this one, except that Trump and Covid never happened. And the drama is at its weakest when it tries to play solemn about the Roys' political whims.

Friday

May 12, 2023

Cockburn

Is E. Jean Carroll’s second pay-day coming?

Has FreedomWorks gone FreedomWoke? FreedomWorks has gone FreedomWoke? That’s the charge of a new campaign by Berman and Co, which says the Koch-funded group’s new COO, Marty Irby, has a history of working with radical animal rights groups with close connections to PETA... and Democrats. FreedomWorks, meanwhile, is a grassroots organization that advocates for free markets, personal liberty and lower taxes.Cockburn notes that Irby’s biography on the FreedomWorks website leaves out these details, instead listing only his lobbyist and consulting work with Republicans. According to his LinkedIn, the last time he worked directly for a member of the GOP was between late 2013 and early 2016, when he served as a communications director for Representative Ed Whitfield.

Thursday

May 11, 2023

Cockburn

CNN reels internally from Trump town hall hangover

CNN’s town hall with 2024 presidential candidate Donald Trump last night was such a doozy that the network’s own senior media reporter, Oliver Darcy, is copping to a widespread hangover this morning. It isn’t hard to find people disgusted by CNN’s choice to host Trump; Twitter is ablaze with users proclaiming that CNN has “a lot of egg on its face” (Justin Baragona) and “should be ashamed of itself” (AOC). Mediaite’s editor-in-chief, Aidan McLaughlin cited a CNN journalist who told him, “That was sickening. Shame on us.” And in his Reliable Sources newsletter this morning, Darcy reported, “CNN and new network boss Chris Licht are facing a fury of criticism — both internally and externally over the event.

Cockburn

Sanna Marin’s marriage is Finnished

Cockburn gave up on love after his last affair, but as of this week there could be hope again. Sanna Marin, Finland's thirty-something, fun-loving, partying prime minister announced Wednesday that she is divorcing her husband Markus Räikönnen after nineteen years as a couple. His loss is our gain. On Instagram Marin wrote: "Together we've filed for divorce. We're grateful for the nineteen years together and for our beloved daughter.” "We're still best friends, close to each other and loving parents. Going forward we will still spend time together as a family and with each other. We wish you will respect our privacy. We won't comment further on this.

Monday

May 8, 2023

Cockburn

Who should replace Tucker Carlson at Fox News?

After what could only be described as a dizzying month in news media, Fox is on the hunt for a Tucker Carlson replacement. Cockburn has some thoughts — and suggestions — on who might be a good fit for the network’s coveted 8 p.m. slot. First, there are obvious candidates within Fox already. Jesse Watters currently hosts Jesse Watters Primetime in the 7 p.m. time slot. Bumping Watters up an hour is thought to be the preferred and likeliest solution within the network. Greg Gutfeld is a close second, having hosted late-night shows from 2007 to the present, with the current Gutfeld! earning impressive viewership numbers. On the more conventional side, there is Brian Kilmeade, who hosts both the weekday Fox & Friends and Saturday’s One Nation with Brian Kilmeade.

Friday

May 5, 2023

Cockburn

Fox you, Media Matters!

You’d think Fox Corporation would be sick of lawsuits by now — but there’s life in the old dog yet. The company has sent a letter to Media Matters for America, after the left-wing watchdog spent the week drip-feeding what they’ve brazenly titled “FOXLEAKS.” So far the “scoops” consist of... Tucker Carlson cracking a few jokes between segments.Fox lawyers write that the footage was “unlawfully obtained.” This has ruined Cockburn’s chances of winning $5, because he was sure Fox were the leakers. Cockburn’s second guess was Abby Grossberg, the former Tucker booker suing her old bosses for maintaining a toxic work environment — but a source familiar with the show says they don’t think it’s Abby.

Wednesday

May 3, 2023

Cockburn

Is the US Navy the new Bud Light?

Cockburn spotted a news story this morning that had him spitting out his breakfast cocktail of bourbon and vicodin (difficult to do these days). He read that the US Navy has appointed a nonbinary drag queen, "Harpy Daniels" as a “digital ambassador” charged with recruiting new members to the military. Cockburn's brief time in Navy Yard means that he knows sailors have unorthodox tastes, but come on. Surely, this must be the handiwork of some rogue underling with access to the Navy’s TikTok password — although isn’t TikTok banned on official military devices? In the wake of the Dylan Mulvaney backlash, which has seen Bud Light stock plummet 17 percent since partnering with the trans activist, could this really have been an edict from the Navy’s top brass?

Cockburn

Joe Biden, bad feminist

Joe Biden has long sought to depict himself as a champion for women — from sponsoring the Violence Against Women Act as a senator to fronting the It’s On Us anti-campus sexual assault campaign as vice president. But frankly, he's not having a very feminist week. Cockburn was shocked to read a report in Politico that TJ Ducklo is “on the cusp of officially reentering Biden world in a senior communications role on his reelection campaign.” Ducklo, you may recall, resigned as White House deputy press secretary in 2021 after yelling at Tara Palmeri, a female reporter then at Politico, threatening to “destroy” her. Palmeri had contacted the White House to ask about Ducklo’s relationship with Axios political reporter Alexi McCammond, who covered the Biden campaign.