White House

You don't need to be a political genius to see that this Hunter Biden indictment is an obvious smokescreen for the White House and Democrats on Capitol Hill. The three-part indictment is very simple and straightforward and could’ve been brought a long time ago... so why this week? Why does it come after a rough opening to September for Democrats, with horrible polls released concerning Joe Biden's age and approval ratings — and particularly the same week that Republicans finally pulled the trigger on an impeachment inquiry? First, it serves to muddy the waters.

It’s hard not to weep for the Republic as trust in our institutions collapses — and collapses for good reasons. Washington cannot retain public confidence when the frontrunners in both parties represent the dregs of public life and are credibly charged with serious malfeasance; when those charges have surrounded both parties’ presidential nominees in every election since 2016 and do so again for 2024.

Even a stopped clock is right twice a day — and Vice President Kamala Harris may have finally met her moment. The immigration-czar-slash-voting-rights-activist-slash-common-sense-gun-safety-proponent is also now taking some work off transportation secretary Pete Buttigieg's plate as he wrangles infant twins. "This issue of transportation is fundamentally about just making sure that people have the ability to get where they need to go," Kamala said of her new issue set Tuesday. First up? Expanding tiny airplane bathrooms. "The majority of domestic flights do not have accessible restrooms. This is absolutely unacceptable," Kamala tweeted. "Our administration will soon announce a solution to help end this inequity." https://twitter.

After party at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue? The New York Post reported Tuesday morning that a substance found in the White House’s West Wing this weekend tested positive for cocaine. Cockburn, who won't complain about this massive win for federal drug legalization, only wants to know who would leave such an expensive substance at the White House. It's a total mystery. Secret service agents found the white powder during a routine round of the White House on Sunday evening while President Biden and his family were away at Camp David. The complex was evacuated at 8:45 p.m. as fire and emergency crews were brought in to investigate the substance.  “We have a yellow bar stating cocaine hydrochloride,” a DC firefighter stated in a radio communication at 8:49 p.m. Sunday.

Confronted with devastating evidence of Biden family grifting, the president’s advocates are abandoning their old defenses and trying some new ones.  Some are attempting to change the subject. Nancy Pelosi offers a sterling example. Asked about the latest evidence connecting Joe Biden with Hunter’s corrupt schemes, she replied that she was too busy defending women’s reproductive rights. Not exactly a full-throated defense of the president. Still others are repeating the familiar refrain, “But Trump is worse.” (More on that in a minute.)  Finally, a shrinking band of Biden supporters are sticking with their old line: you may have caught everyone who shares Joe’s DNA, but you haven’t caught ol’ Joe himself.

Hunter Biden will plead guilty to two tax misdemeanors and has struck a deal with federal prosecutors over a felony gun charge. According to a court filing released by US Attorney David Weiss on Tuesday, Biden was charged with two counts of “willful failure to pay federal income tax” and for “possession of a firearm by a person who is an unlawful user of or addicted to a controlled substance.”  Weiss, who has overseen the federal probe into Biden’s taxes since 2018, has agreed to recommend probation for Biden’s tax violations and it is unlikely he will serve jail time for either his tax and gun charges, according to the Washington Post. If Biden complies with the terms of his pretrial diversion, he could have the gun charge removed from his record in two years.

The White House lawn became the latest battleground in the “Free the Nipple” fight this weekend.  A shocking display of inequality was captured on video when TikTok influencer and trans woman Rose Montoya filmed herself topless in front of the White House, flaunting her breasts during a Pride event. Montoya was joined by two trans male activists who were also shirtless. Yet only Montoya — whether out of a sense of decency or internalized social pressures — censored her nipples with her hands. For all the White House's moral posturing, Cockburn is shocked they would tolerate such brazen inequality.

Search’s up at the Biden beach house. President Biden’s personal attorney Bob Bauer explains, “Today, with the President’s full support and cooperation, the DOJ is conducting a planned search of his home in Rehoboth, Delaware.” A bevy of black SUVs and sedans swarmed around the Biden property, once the site of happy days where the Biden clan congregated, now the target of the FBI. My heart goes out not to Biden, who was obviously lax in his handling of classified documents, but to the poor slobs in the FBI who have to tromp through his various homes in search of papers that he was supposed to have handed over to the National Archives in January 2017. It’s difficult to think of a more tedious task.

It should be obvious by now that too many classified documents are floating around Florida, Delaware, and Indiana. They were removed without authorization and stored improperly under Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and Mike Pence respectively. Most of them, it seems, were hurriedly packed by government aides during an administration’s final days, even as the president and vice president were busy handling their official responsibilities. National security law doesn’t distinguish between the accidental and deliberate mishandling of classified documents, but the public does. They know the president and vice president bear heavy, official burdens until the moment they are replaced.

After President Joe Biden’s State of the Union address last year, White House chief of staff and the administration's resident Twitter addict Ron Klain joined a confab of journalists on Twitter Spaces to discuss the speech. When a reporter asked Klain, in response to Biden’s poor approval ratings, whether he thought they were having trouble getting their message out, Klain responded, “Well, I’m doing Twitter Spaces, aren’t I?” It was a perfect demonstration of how Klain had taken to guiding administration policy in accordance with the whims of Twitter.

Cockburn came across this interesting little tidbit while he was stirring his first apéritif of the early afternoon: a Vox preview of Christopher Whipple’s forthcoming book, The Fight of His Life: Inside Joe Biden's White House, reports that President Biden is distrustful of his Secret Service team and believes the agency fabricated a story about Biden’s German Shepherd, Major, biting an agent. Major Biden and fellow White House German Shepherd, Champ, were removed to Delaware for a while following the alleged incident. Vox reports how in the book, “Whipple details how Biden was showing a friend around the White House and pointed to the spot where Major allegedly bit a member of Biden’s security team. ‘Look, the Secret Service are never up here.

President Biden said Tuesday he was “surprised” to learn that in November his lawyers had found classified documents in his former office at a Washington think tank. No doubt he was equally shocked when more classified docs turned up in his Delaware home. Yet the tone of the mainstream media seems to be that boys will be boys. Since Biden is being so cooperative with authorities after being caught red-handed, maybe this has nothing in common with Donald Trump's cache of classified documents at Mar-a-Lago. Or Hillary's cache on her private e-mail server. Could there be a double-standard? Biden had some/several/a bunch of classified documents while Trump had hundreds so that's different.

Top Twitter user Ron Klain is at it again. This time, the terminally online White House chief of staff tweeted out a list of talking points to bring up when your Uncle goes after Joe Biden at Thanksgiving dinner. Putting aside the fact that uncle should only be capitalized when it is being used as a proper noun, Cockburn is stunned at the daftness of the compilation. https://twitter.com/WHCOS/status/1595414110438662144 Klain claims that “gas prices are down by $1.35/gallon since June and inflation is moderating”, which while technically true, requires you to ignore the fact that gas prices were over $4.90/gallon in June. He uses the same laughable logic regarding inflation: it has "moderated" from a multiple-decade’s high of 9.1 percent in June to a still painful 7.

You know the Democrats are grasping at straws when you see the White House Twitter account praising President Biden for this year’s increased Social Security checks. Particularly, Cockburn is at pains to point out, as the increase in Social Security is indirectly indexed to inflation. "Seniors are getting the biggest increase in their Social Security checks in ten years through President Biden's leadership," the White House bragged on Tuesday. Even Twitter's in-house moderators were taken aback, deigning to slap a "context" label on the post. After helpful users added the missing context on Wednesday, the White House's tweet mysteriously disappeared. How curious!

The late columnist Molly Ivins once quipped about the inhabitants of “the world’s greatest deliberative body” that “‘Get along, go along’ is not an inspirational philosophy, and only God knows how much moral cowardice it has covered up over the years. Serve your time, collect your chits, and cash 'em in for your home state? No, I'd say we could ask for more than that from our senators.” She was right, of course; we should ask more of our senators. But would that really help? Ensconced in chamber and institutionalized by the ways thereof, are our senators even capable of more? This is especially important when considering the current job performance of President Joe Biden, who has spent 36 of his 79 years as a member of the Senate.

The White House falsely claimed Thursday that there were no Covid-19 vaccines available when President Joe Biden took office in January 2021. "When President Biden took office, millions were unemployed and there was no vaccine available," the official White House account tweeted. In truth, the first vaccines were administered under the FDA's emergency-use authorization in mid-December of 2020. They were developed under the Trump administration's "Operation Warp Speed", a public-private partnership wherein the federal government invested billions of dollars into vaccine development and brokered a deal with pharmaceutical companies to purchase the vaccines once they were approved.