Parliament

There was a wonderful outbreak of wit and erudition at Parliament this morning. The sketch-writers Simon Hoggart and Matthew Parris appeared before the Public Administration Select Committee to discuss the perils of political jargon. Simon Hoggart kicked off by imagining Churchill’s war-time speeches re-written by a local government wonk. ‘We will fight on the beaches’ turned into ‘an ongoing programme of hostile engagement in littoral sectors.’ The committee chairman, Tony Wright, wondered if his anxiety about jargon was misplaced. ‘Does this drivel matter or does it just irritate us?’ Matthew Parris pointed out that jargon is attractive because it confers an aura of learning and makes idiot politicians sound like world experts.

Trevor Kavanagh’s column in The Sun today has a little story in it which shows how tense relations are between John Bercow and some MPs. ‘Thin-skinned new Commons Speaker John Bercow is a “tosser”. Not my choice of words, although it fairly describes a man who is fast becoming even more embarrassing than disgraced predecessor Michael Martin. The offensive term was used last week in an angry spat with Mr Bercow by an MP who has since apologised in writing-at Mr Bercow’s insistence. The MP is now absolved. Speaker Bercow remains a “tosser”.’ Now, I’ve no idea of the rights and wrongs of this argument and calling someone a tosser is hardly a mature way of resolving an argument.