Male health

Help! I’ve got ‘schlong Covid’

From our UK edition

One of the difficulties with having difficulties in your gentleman’s area is describing it to your doctor. Saying 'I’ve got a problem with my willy,' makes you sound like a five-year-old. 'Penis' sounds whiny and American, and everything else sounds like you might be being deliberately rude. I went for 'I think I’ve got Covid on my cock,' which I hoped didn’t make me sound like a hypochondriac and was suitably forthright for a man-to-man encounter with one’s GP. 'OK,' says a politely interested Dr McCall. 'What’s precisely wrong with your cock?' I can’t find any figures for 'schlong Covid'. There are no studies in the Lancet or online support groups Now a crisis of confidence. 'Well… ever since I’ve had Covid...