Dalek 2
More cartoons
Thursday
Tattoos 2
‘I’d like some summer reading for the beach.’
Fat 2
‘I suppose I just have to accept that you’re not Daddy’s little girl any more.’
Bercow
‘It’s amazing! Sally Bercow hasn’t spilled the beans!’
Loans
‘I borrowed this, but I can’t find any shops to spend it in.’
Thursday
Alien 2
‘You’ve travelled a billion light years to steal our natural resources? Sucker! We used them all up decades ago!’
Defence
‘Ah, I see you’re employing the English Defence.’
Fat
Emergency
‘There’s nothing wrong with me now, but I expect there will be by the time I’m seen.’
Wilkinson
‘No need to do your Jonny Wilkinson, just kick the door down.’
Spies
‘Couldn’t you just have carried a copy of the Times?’
Portas
Celeb
‘Did you pack this bag, write this book, design this range of clothes and bedlinen and manufacture this perfume yourself?’
Fruitcake
Forgot
‘Say what you like about gay marriage — I’ve forgotten all about our desperate financial situation.’
Bing
‘OK, which one of you did that?
Quality
‘This is Jennings, in charge of driving up standards.’
Thursday
Alien
‘You always get bloody buskers at space stations.’
Tv
‘That’s the television.’
Health
‘They come over here, stealing our jabs…’